There is nothing as addictive as the aroma of a new romance...I've been secretly attracted to this guy, Maroon Five. He was actually the opposite of almost all past boyfriends I've ever had simply because I knew I was no match for this guy. He was controlling, dominating, definitely more matured than me, but sweet and thoughtful in the most unexpected ways. I honestly don't know why, but for some reason, I am attracted to him like moth to a flame. I never really entertained any ideas of us hooking up because I knew that it was forbidden. Besides, he has never implied anything before that might show that he was also attracted to me. He would joke about going out on a date with me but I never really took him seriously. I was contented admiring him secretly and from a distance.
Until lately, things seem to be taking a strange turn. His attentiveness and sweetness to me particularly, makes me think that maybe this isn't just a one-way thing. It felt like finally, someone is waking me up from a very deep sleep. Once again, the feelings of uncertainty, fear of rejection, and confusion become mixed with that nostalgic feeling of excitement and anticipation. I am suddenly familiarized with the "kilig" feeling once again, after such a long long time.
Sometimes, I think that maybe I'm just imagining all this. So what if he held my hand the whole time while we were talking? That could just mean, he didn't want me to just pass by him right away. So what if I felt him caress my hand? I could be just imagining all that. It's not as if he texts me or anything. I mean, if he was interested, I'm sure he would since he does know my number. But why the hell does he always single me out when I'm with friends. Maybe it's a reverse thing. Maybe he really doesn't like me, that's why he frequently singles me out. Maybe he's just a very big flirt. Or like I said, maybe I'm just imagining the whole thing.
Shiyet... here I go again...
No comments:
Post a Comment