Declaring War with the Ex-Boyfriend

Trying to improve my Friends list in my friendster, I decided to look at the friends list of those already in my friends list. I then came across the profile of this girl in medical school - we'll call her OB Girl - who was one year older than me, whom I spent one 24 hour duty together during one of my OB-Gyne paybacks. Thinking that that already qualified her to be in my friends list, I was about to click on "add as friend" when I remembered one very vital information.

OB Girl and my ex-boyfriend, WrongAtAllLevels, were classmates in college and they were very good friends actually.

My mind was in turmoil. I was so confused that I was practically having a conversation with my own conscience.

Conscience: What do you care that they're friends? Go on and add her to your friends list.

Me: But what if he sees me in her friends list? I don't think he'd like that.

Conscience: What do you care what he likes? You hate him, remember?

Me: Yeah, but...

Conscience: He doesn't own OB Girl nor her friendship. Why should you limit the people you are friends with just because you and WrongAtAllLevels aren't good friends?

Me: I know Wrong. He will not like this at all.

Conscience: Well, he doesn't like a lot of things. The only things he likes are 24-hour sex and that stupid dream of his of being a rockstar.

Me: But--

In my mind, conscience won over me. But unlike conscience, I had the faculties to accomplish things. So, I decided to check out OB Girl's friends list and see if WrongAtAllLevel's name would be listed on the same page as my own should I decide to add OB Girl's name on my friends list.

With my name and WrongAtAllLevel's name both starting with the same two letters, I guess we all know the answer to that.

Yes, we would both end up on the same page. There would be no way that he wouldn't see my name because it was too long and my photo will be separated from his by only 4-5 other photos. The candid photo of myself posing on top of my Harrison's Internal Medicine book would be pitted against his photo of his 27 year old self and his 16 year old girlfriend, probably taken a few months back considering that she didn't look very pregnant yet.

For a photo cofrontation, I was surely going to lose this one.

Where are new boyfriends-for-hire when you need one?

OB Girl's yours, you f**kin' craddlesnatcher. I don't need her name on my friends list nor do I need any hint nor tinge of your crappiness. Now excuse me, I need to go and wash off the 2 years of SHIT and CRAP that you have saddled on my god-forsaken shoulders.