Paybacks
I will be missing online for the next few days. This is my schedule for this week:
April 23 8 AM - April 24 3 AM OB-Gyne Payback
April 24 8 AM - 10 AM Surgery Payback
April 25 8 AM - April 26 8 AM Internal Medicine Payback
If you need me, just look for me at ZCMC. I'm the skin and bones (Ha! I wish!) hiding behind the oily face, Rexona-has-let-me-down armpits, ink-covered fully-furnished blazer pockets or lochia-stinking scrub suit, sprinting aound the hallowed hallways, doing the dirty jobs that the residents, pre-residents and PGIs think are so totally beneath them.
Welcome to MY post-clerkship party.
Monday, May 22, 2006
The Research Proposal Presentation Telenovela
I had presented my research proposal today. Two OHP slides later and a barrage of disparaging comments had been thrown into my face.
"Why don't you think of another topic instead?"
I was about to devise a way how to make a torade of feminine tears fall ceremoniously down my face when in comes the saviour of mankind.
Or as we fondly call her, Dr. Bernadette Chua-Macrohon.
Fighting crime, trying to save the world. Here they come just in time...
"I have a suggestion. Why don't you change your methodology to a case-control study with NFP acceptors and non-NP acceptors..."
There is a God.
Because of the difficulties regarding the suggested modification of my paper, she has decided to take me under her wing. So, I am now under the supervision of one of the best research advisers provided by the school.
You are now officially looking at a girl who, despite lacking the skills and the exuberance to make a good research and having submitted a haphazardly written research proposal for the sake of having something to pass, has succeeded in making things go to her advantage.
God still looks after girls like me after all. Hehehe...
I had presented my research proposal today. Two OHP slides later and a barrage of disparaging comments had been thrown into my face.
"Why don't you think of another topic instead?"
I was about to devise a way how to make a torade of feminine tears fall ceremoniously down my face when in comes the saviour of mankind.
Or as we fondly call her, Dr. Bernadette Chua-Macrohon.
Fighting crime, trying to save the world. Here they come just in time...
"I have a suggestion. Why don't you change your methodology to a case-control study with NFP acceptors and non-NP acceptors..."
There is a God.
Because of the difficulties regarding the suggested modification of my paper, she has decided to take me under her wing. So, I am now under the supervision of one of the best research advisers provided by the school.
You are now officially looking at a girl who, despite lacking the skills and the exuberance to make a good research and having submitted a haphazardly written research proposal for the sake of having something to pass, has succeeded in making things go to her advantage.
God still looks after girls like me after all. Hehehe...
Tales of a Girl Wearing a Short White Skirt
What is it about short white skirts that make every heterosexual male in the room look twice, convert even the most decent guy to a blustering idiot and make him lose all his inane capacity to think with his upper brain?
Saturday morning. I felt like waring a short white skirt as I passed my research proposal. I figured, even if my paper sucked, well, at least I looked GOOOOD. Upon seeing my attire, my Mom asked if I was going on a date. As if I needed the excuse of a date to wear a skirt.
Flashback to year 2002 when I was with this ex-boyfriend, Acne Vulgaris, who DEMANDED that I wear a skirt when we're together. He apparently didn't want to be mistakenly seen making out with a guy... Yeah, right. Blame your identity confusion to me, you closet bisexual, you!
Another flashback to year 2004 when I was with another ex-boyfriend, WrongAtAllLevels, who oggled me like I was dessert on the menu everytime I wore that short white skirt. We usually ended up doing a lot of hand wrestling, with him wanting to crawl his hands up my skirt and me trying to fend him off... Yes, I was dating an adolescent-still-trapped-in-a man's-body back then.
Of course, that didn't stop me from wearing that skirt when I was with him. Hehehe...
Going back to that fateful Saturday morning, as I paraded myself on the hallowed hallways of ZCMC, Maroon 5* saw me. "Uy, sexy, ah."
"Thanks," I replied, feigning a blush to suggest innocence. As if I didn't intentionally mean to look sexy but I just ended up that way by accident.
Yeah, right. I'm such a slut. I admit it. Big freakin' deal.
Another male resident called my attention, "Girl na girl tayo, ah."
"Girl naman po talaga ako, doc."
Oh, come on. Am I really that boyish that I need to wear a short white skirt to prove that I was born with no Y chromosome? So I know I don't really come out as the most feminine of creatures. When I wear pants, people think I'm boyish. I used to think it was the way I walked so I decided to retrain my gait and walk with a slight swaggle of my butt. It apparently didn't work at all because an OB resident still thought that I was actually a lesbian.
Me, a lesbian? Yeah, that would be the day.
Cute IW* actually stopped in his tracks and spent about 5 minutes making small talk with me, telling me I had sex appeal, while being touchy-feely all of a sudden... This short whie skirt is apparently geting me a LOT of male - wanted and unwanted - attention.
And it sure wasn't going to end there.
By evening, Maroon 5 texted me and apologized for not being able to pay more attention to me that morning because he was busy and that I was, and I quote "so pretty".
Hmmm... isn't this short white skirt amazing?
Sunday. Inspired by the day's events, I decided to wear the said skirt again the next day at a night out with a couple of my girlfriends. My brother saw me and said I looked ike a porn star...
I figured, what does he know? He's only 13.
As I walked into he restaurant, I could feel all eyes on me. Man, this skirt really is a guy magnet. Even when we transferred to another bar, the skirt was still letting its magical powers be known. I mean, I wasn't gifted with fabulous long legs and instead of gazelle-like thighs, I stood on two slabs of cellulite that apparently passed off as my lower extremities. But still, the short white skirt was working its magic on me like it was Blusang Itim and I was Snooky Serna.
And so I sashayed and sashayed in the magical short white skirt like Cinderella at a ball until it was time to go.
As I stood outsie the bar while one of my my friends talked privately with her boyfriend, I suddenly began to feel queasy. And nauseaous. And incredibly sick.
BWWWAAAAAAAARRRRRKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!
Repeat that four times with a 1-2 minute interval in between.
I had puked out everything that had passed into my gastointestinal system that night. Pieces of Chicken barbeque, rice, Potato mojos, onion rings, salted peanuts, mixed with water, Clam soup, Coke Light, San Miguel Beer Lights, all swam in a huge barf puddle at the sidewalk infront of my friend's boyfriend's bar. I had actually vomited after two freakin' bottles of light beer, while a bunch of dirty old men trying to get drunk stared at me and my friends watched me in disbelief, with their mouths wide agape.
What poise I had gathered wearing that short white skirt was now lost and replaced by embarassment and utter humiliation. Whatever admirers I had garnered with that short white skirt had now mysteriously disappeared after seeing that fateful incident.
Oh, well...
We did have a lot of fun, my short white skirt and I.
See you after the next washing.
*not their real name
Saturday morning. I felt like waring a short white skirt as I passed my research proposal. I figured, even if my paper sucked, well, at least I looked GOOOOD. Upon seeing my attire, my Mom asked if I was going on a date. As if I needed the excuse of a date to wear a skirt.
Flashback to year 2002 when I was with this ex-boyfriend, Acne Vulgaris, who DEMANDED that I wear a skirt when we're together. He apparently didn't want to be mistakenly seen making out with a guy... Yeah, right. Blame your identity confusion to me, you closet bisexual, you!
Another flashback to year 2004 when I was with another ex-boyfriend, WrongAtAllLevels, who oggled me like I was dessert on the menu everytime I wore that short white skirt. We usually ended up doing a lot of hand wrestling, with him wanting to crawl his hands up my skirt and me trying to fend him off... Yes, I was dating an adolescent-still-trapped-in-a man's-body back then.
Of course, that didn't stop me from wearing that skirt when I was with him. Hehehe...
Going back to that fateful Saturday morning, as I paraded myself on the hallowed hallways of ZCMC, Maroon 5* saw me. "Uy, sexy, ah."
"Thanks," I replied, feigning a blush to suggest innocence. As if I didn't intentionally mean to look sexy but I just ended up that way by accident.
Yeah, right. I'm such a slut. I admit it. Big freakin' deal.
Another male resident called my attention, "Girl na girl tayo, ah."
"Girl naman po talaga ako, doc."
Oh, come on. Am I really that boyish that I need to wear a short white skirt to prove that I was born with no Y chromosome? So I know I don't really come out as the most feminine of creatures. When I wear pants, people think I'm boyish. I used to think it was the way I walked so I decided to retrain my gait and walk with a slight swaggle of my butt. It apparently didn't work at all because an OB resident still thought that I was actually a lesbian.
Me, a lesbian? Yeah, that would be the day.
Cute IW* actually stopped in his tracks and spent about 5 minutes making small talk with me, telling me I had sex appeal, while being touchy-feely all of a sudden... This short whie skirt is apparently geting me a LOT of male - wanted and unwanted - attention.
And it sure wasn't going to end there.
By evening, Maroon 5 texted me and apologized for not being able to pay more attention to me that morning because he was busy and that I was, and I quote "so pretty".
Hmmm... isn't this short white skirt amazing?
Sunday. Inspired by the day's events, I decided to wear the said skirt again the next day at a night out with a couple of my girlfriends. My brother saw me and said I looked ike a porn star...
I figured, what does he know? He's only 13.
As I walked into he restaurant, I could feel all eyes on me. Man, this skirt really is a guy magnet. Even when we transferred to another bar, the skirt was still letting its magical powers be known. I mean, I wasn't gifted with fabulous long legs and instead of gazelle-like thighs, I stood on two slabs of cellulite that apparently passed off as my lower extremities. But still, the short white skirt was working its magic on me like it was Blusang Itim and I was Snooky Serna.
And so I sashayed and sashayed in the magical short white skirt like Cinderella at a ball until it was time to go.
As I stood outsie the bar while one of my my friends talked privately with her boyfriend, I suddenly began to feel queasy. And nauseaous. And incredibly sick.
BWWWAAAAAAAARRRRRKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!
Repeat that four times with a 1-2 minute interval in between.
I had puked out everything that had passed into my gastointestinal system that night. Pieces of Chicken barbeque, rice, Potato mojos, onion rings, salted peanuts, mixed with water, Clam soup, Coke Light, San Miguel Beer Lights, all swam in a huge barf puddle at the sidewalk infront of my friend's boyfriend's bar. I had actually vomited after two freakin' bottles of light beer, while a bunch of dirty old men trying to get drunk stared at me and my friends watched me in disbelief, with their mouths wide agape.
What poise I had gathered wearing that short white skirt was now lost and replaced by embarassment and utter humiliation. Whatever admirers I had garnered with that short white skirt had now mysteriously disappeared after seeing that fateful incident.
Oh, well...
We did have a lot of fun, my short white skirt and I.
See you after the next washing.
*not their real name
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Damn you research!
Research sucks.
I would rather do 1000 NGT, 500 Cytotec insertion, 100 DREs, 50 FBC, 25 IV insertion, 15 suturing, 5 dressing and 3 Cholecystectomy assists in the OR than do research.
And for those who want to ask, NO, I haven't worked on the modifications of my research yet. And neither have I met with my facilitator, even if the deadline for submission of the research proposal is tomorow.
What can I say? Research sucks.
Research sucks.
I would rather do 1000 NGT, 500 Cytotec insertion, 100 DREs, 50 FBC, 25 IV insertion, 15 suturing, 5 dressing and 3 Cholecystectomy assists in the OR than do research.
And for those who want to ask, NO, I haven't worked on the modifications of my research yet. And neither have I met with my facilitator, even if the deadline for submission of the research proposal is tomorow.
What can I say? Research sucks.
Disadvantages of Living With Females vs. Males
In a few weeks or so, I'll be back at the community, living at some house with my medical school classmates for approximately 10 months. Combining four hot females and two guys with potential (Hahaha... Is it too obvious that I'm making sipsip to my groupmates?) makes a very lethal mix of future doctors. The weird conglomerate of fashionista, California girl, overweight but hot mama (Blog ko to! Walang aangal!), vertically-challenged Bisayan beauty added with loverboy and boy genius makes for one fun-filled but equally-challenging 10 months.
In a few weeks or so, I'll be back at the community, living at some house with my medical school classmates for approximately 10 months. Combining four hot females and two guys with potential (Hahaha... Is it too obvious that I'm making sipsip to my groupmates?) makes a very lethal mix of future doctors. The weird conglomerate of fashionista, California girl, overweight but hot mama (Blog ko to! Walang aangal!), vertically-challenged Bisayan beauty added with loverboy and boy genius makes for one fun-filled but equally-challenging 10 months.
I know it hasn't been easy for our boys to deal with our female shenanigans. After all, females aren't that easy to live with. Just look at the things that they had to deal with in order to live peacefully with the opposite sex. These also apply to any guy who has to live with any female, for whatever purpose it might be:
1. Our panties, thongs and underwire bras attack their faces as they hang their own underwear on the clothesline.
2. They have to endure looking at used napkins and pantyliners in the trash cans.
3. Looking for a simple comb amidst the barrage of make-up, shampoos, face creams, hair accessories and assortment of brushes in the vanity table as they fix their own hair.
4. Handing us tissues everytime we watch a sappy movie on our laptop.
5. They can't watch porn from our laptop.
6. They can't whack off in the CR. One of us is sure to notice how long he has been in there and make a comment about it.
7. Waiting for us to finish taking a bath.
8. They are at risk of being put into the "Friends Only" category. I mean, seriously, if you aren't already dating and you were close enough to see each other's underwear in the sampayan, surely, don't expect the sparks to come out anymore.
9. Having to listen to "You are like a brother to me."
10. They are unable to be their true self. They can't scratch their balls infront of us and neither can they go around the house in nothing but their underwear. Plus, because they don't see themselves as well-endowed above the waist, they have to wear a T-shirt before getting out of the bathroom. Or risk being made fun of.
But then, it hasn't really been such a party for us as well. They're not exactly what you call the best roommates ever. For girls, there are disadvantages to living with males, such as:
1. Having their briefs attack our faces in the clothesline.
2. Having to look cute and pretty all the time. They are, after all still a member of the opposite sex.
3. Enduring the stench of Athlete's foot.
4. Making sure that you sit decently and that everything that should be covered is well-covered despite the really skanky shortpants that you are wearing.
5. Forcing to shave because you can't pluck your armpit hairs infront of these guys.
6. You can't eat too much, not even the leftovers, or else someone will comment.
7. Being teased at all the time. And I mean, all the time.
8. Shortening your grooming time from one hour to 10 minutes, because they're always making you hurry up.
9. Having to pretend they didn't whack off in the CR, even if it took them practically an hour in there.
10. Having to wear a bra all the time, even at home, even when you're sleeping.
DISCLAIMER: This is in no way reflective of my groupmates in Barangay Silucap. Well, at least, some of them aren't. Hehehe... As far as I know, our boys don't have Athlete's foot. They in fact take very good care of their feet. I don't know if any one of them actually whack off in the CR. And if they do, I don't think they will admit it. And finally, Noy, you may come out of the bathroom shirtless. We won't make fun of you. Promise...
A Clerk's Guide To Hot Spots For Making Out in ZCMC
They barrage us with a million and one insults, consume our well-needed sleeping time with OR assists, Cytotec insertions and RBS q4, use up our tired little bodies until we are nothing but skin and bones. We deserve to be treated like humans. We too have animal urges. Therefore, between delivering babies and intubating patients, we also need that quickie fix. Thus, I decided to enlighten you with, not one, not two but 15 top spots to get that quick booty action in between 24 hour duties in our so-called home away from home, the ZCMC hospital.
1. The Minor OR across Room 13 (Optha OPD).
You can use the gigantic microscope to look into each other's eyes, literally, an check out for your partner's pterygium, corneal laceration, cataract, etc. And if that bores you, you can always make use of that big OR bed.
2. The Ward 8's Doctor's Quarters at the 2nd Floor.
The darkly unlit staircase leading to the 2nd floor is a foreplay-magnet already by itself. You can surprise your man and come into the room wearing nothing but your patient's chart, strategically placed infront of your best-kept secrets.
3. The OR.
For a truly aseptic environment. Best for guys and girls with poor immune systems (asthmatics, comatose, Bubble Boy)... who want to get dirty.
4. The PGI Male Quarters.
Predictable, yes, but still useful for those quickies. Just make sure to lock the door, okay? Not all of us are open to the idea of looking at some girl's boobies or some guy's hairy ass at 2 o' clock in the morning.
5. Room 1 (OB-Gyne OPD).
You gotta have a kick out of doing the deed in a place where woman who have done the deed are checked out. Unfortunately, the strange contraption of a bed might stifle your creativity seeing that not a lot of positions can be done in here... Still, there's no harm in trying...
6. The dark corner between Room 10 (Pedia OPD) and Radiology.
It's dark and isolated. Enough said.
7. The Chapel.
It's sacrilege, I know, but you can't blame a girl who has spent most of her life in Catholic schools from thinking about it =)
8. Procto Room at Ward 4.
Only you and your man will know what you guys did with the proctoscope. And I'm sure it wasn't pretty...
9. The IE Room at Ward 1.
After receiving all sorts of insult and demerits from your favorite OB resident, you can defile their holy ward by inviting your man for a quick "Internal Examination."
10. The ZCMC Quadrangle, aka Zamboanga's version of UP Diliman's Sunken Garden.
This place is great because there are a lot of places to do the deed in, whether it's at a bench, the grass, the fountain, under the tree... And the scenery is not bad either. Watch out though for security guards because there are plenty just around the area. This is highly recommended for guys and girls who secretly want to get caught.
11. ER Supply Room.
It contains plenty of gadgets that can be used as sex paraphernalia. You might even unleash your creativity with all the things that you can grab onto this minuscule of a room, whether it be a Betadyne-soaked cotton balls, stainless steel containers, rolls of gauze, plaster, etc.
12. The stairs leading to the 2nd floor of the Ward 2 Doctor's Quarters.
Just think about the possibilities... The place already looks like a stockroom that no janitor has cleaned for millenniums so you don't need to clean up afterward.
13. The ICU.
For a well-sanitized environment. And if your man is about to have a Myocardial Infarction with all the excitement (which means that you're probably screwing with someone thrice your age, you dirty, dirty girl!), you'll have an O2 tank and Intubation set on hand.
14. The PE Room at the Blood Bank.
You can pretend to be the doctor and him, your patient, or vice versa, and proceed to do an extensive Physical Examination on each other.
Him: "Oh, doctor, do I have to remove my pants?"
You: "Well, you can't donate blood if you have a history of STD, you know?"
Him: "Oh, doctor, I'm sure I don't."
You: "Let me check so we can be sure about it."
Him: "Okay, doctor. But can you please remove your shirt as well?"
You: "Sure... I'll even throw out my pants as well. After all, the patient is always right."
15. The Conference Hall.
Just for kicks =)
DISCLAIMER: I am too much of a conservative - Yes, Me! A Conservative! Don't you dare laugh! - to actually try one of these places myself but I have actually heard from people who tried. I swear to God this is true. You're free to try them yourself, you know... But if one of these days, we see each other in the said places, just mind your own business and don't say a word... It'll be our little secret...
They barrage us with a million and one insults, consume our well-needed sleeping time with OR assists, Cytotec insertions and RBS q4, use up our tired little bodies until we are nothing but skin and bones. We deserve to be treated like humans. We too have animal urges. Therefore, between delivering babies and intubating patients, we also need that quickie fix. Thus, I decided to enlighten you with, not one, not two but 15 top spots to get that quick booty action in between 24 hour duties in our so-called home away from home, the ZCMC hospital.
1. The Minor OR across Room 13 (Optha OPD).
You can use the gigantic microscope to look into each other's eyes, literally, an check out for your partner's pterygium, corneal laceration, cataract, etc. And if that bores you, you can always make use of that big OR bed.
2. The Ward 8's Doctor's Quarters at the 2nd Floor.
The darkly unlit staircase leading to the 2nd floor is a foreplay-magnet already by itself. You can surprise your man and come into the room wearing nothing but your patient's chart, strategically placed infront of your best-kept secrets.
3. The OR.For a truly aseptic environment. Best for guys and girls with poor immune systems (asthmatics, comatose, Bubble Boy)... who want to get dirty.
4. The PGI Male Quarters.
Predictable, yes, but still useful for those quickies. Just make sure to lock the door, okay? Not all of us are open to the idea of looking at some girl's boobies or some guy's hairy ass at 2 o' clock in the morning.
5. Room 1 (OB-Gyne OPD).
You gotta have a kick out of doing the deed in a place where woman who have done the deed are checked out. Unfortunately, the strange contraption of a bed might stifle your creativity seeing that not a lot of positions can be done in here... Still, there's no harm in trying...
6. The dark corner between Room 10 (Pedia OPD) and Radiology.
It's dark and isolated. Enough said.
7. The Chapel.
It's sacrilege, I know, but you can't blame a girl who has spent most of her life in Catholic schools from thinking about it =)
8. Procto Room at Ward 4.
Only you and your man will know what you guys did with the proctoscope. And I'm sure it wasn't pretty...
9. The IE Room at Ward 1.
After receiving all sorts of insult and demerits from your favorite OB resident, you can defile their holy ward by inviting your man for a quick "Internal Examination."
10. The ZCMC Quadrangle, aka Zamboanga's version of UP Diliman's Sunken Garden.
11. ER Supply Room.
It contains plenty of gadgets that can be used as sex paraphernalia. You might even unleash your creativity with all the things that you can grab onto this minuscule of a room, whether it be a Betadyne-soaked cotton balls, stainless steel containers, rolls of gauze, plaster, etc.
12. The stairs leading to the 2nd floor of the Ward 2 Doctor's Quarters.
Just think about the possibilities... The place already looks like a stockroom that no janitor has cleaned for millenniums so you don't need to clean up afterward.
13. The ICU.
For a well-sanitized environment. And if your man is about to have a Myocardial Infarction with all the excitement (which means that you're probably screwing with someone thrice your age, you dirty, dirty girl!), you'll have an O2 tank and Intubation set on hand.
14. The PE Room at the Blood Bank.
You can pretend to be the doctor and him, your patient, or vice versa, and proceed to do an extensive Physical Examination on each other.
Him: "Oh, doctor, do I have to remove my pants?"
You: "Well, you can't donate blood if you have a history of STD, you know?"
Him: "Oh, doctor, I'm sure I don't."
You: "Let me check so we can be sure about it."
Him: "Okay, doctor. But can you please remove your shirt as well?"
You: "Sure... I'll even throw out my pants as well. After all, the patient is always right."
15. The Conference Hall.
Just for kicks =)
DISCLAIMER: I am too much of a conservative - Yes, Me! A Conservative! Don't you dare laugh! - to actually try one of these places myself but I have actually heard from people who tried. I swear to God this is true. You're free to try them yourself, you know... But if one of these days, we see each other in the said places, just mind your own business and don't say a word... It'll be our little secret...
Of Passing and Butterfly Tattoos
This is the face of the girl who has passed her post-clerkship exam!
I was thinking of putting up a butterfly tattoo at my lumbosacral area to celebrate the occasion. Kind of like something to look at to make me remember what I accomplished but like the girl that I am, I spent my money shopping for things I didn't need. Hehehe...
Maybe next time!
The End of the Road
My lucky streak has ended. I am about to taste my very first failing grade tomorrow in my entire medical school life. Apparently, only 6 out of 20 have passed. I honestly don't see myself being among the six. I've been enjoying life too much for the past few days that my academics have pretty much taken the back seat,. Arghhhh! Oh well...
But if by some miracle I did pass the exam, I swear I'm going to minimize my barhopping days and drunken nights out. Maybe just once a week, promise. Is that okay, Lord?
Help, lord. Help!
My lucky streak has ended. I am about to taste my very first failing grade tomorrow in my entire medical school life. Apparently, only 6 out of 20 have passed. I honestly don't see myself being among the six. I've been enjoying life too much for the past few days that my academics have pretty much taken the back seat,. Arghhhh! Oh well...
But if by some miracle I did pass the exam, I swear I'm going to minimize my barhopping days and drunken nights out. Maybe just once a week, promise. Is that okay, Lord?
Help, lord. Help!
Saying my Goodbyes
Yesterday was the last day of our clerkship. I'm done with hospital duties for now. As I was walking home Iast night, I realized that despite all the hardships we encountered during our 6 months in the hospital, I enjoyed the experience a lot and I would definitely be missing a lot of things/people/situations in the hospital. So, let me take this opportunity to say my goodbyes to the people and places that have kept me sane during my 6 months of hospital duty and made these 6 months one of the greatest experiences an aspiring medical doctor could ever ask for.
Goodbye residents... To Doc Alawaddin, my yosi buddy and tong-its mastermind. You're such a flirt, Doc! Hehehe, joke... Doc Akalal, you're so nice! I very much enjoyed being one of the Akalal babies... Doc Bastero, let's drink again with Janet one of these days. And be faithful to your wife!... Doc Miranda, thanks for the night out at Ground Zero. No more hang-over for you!... Doc Amilhasan, where are you?... Doc Barrios, behave! There are a lot of diseases spreading around nowadays. Hehehe... Doc Balido, thanks for lunch at the Dietary, even if clerks are prohibited there... Doc Bravo, thanks for considering me a good friend to keep your secrets. I'm so touched... Doc Buena, no comment. Don't want to have 
demerits increased... Doc ST, even if you are very demanding, thanks for your patience with us... Doc Rojo, Daddy! You're so nice! ... Doc Lim, I mean, Papa Lim, ultimate crush of the Ortho Angels. Hahaha... We'll miss you!... Doc Cuevas, thanks for the craniotomy experience. Will my beauty pass up already as Future Neurosurgeon? Hehehe.. Doc Mangkabung, it's okay. That's life. You'lll soon find someone more worthy of you... Doctora Akalal, our pasalubong, doc!... and to the rest of the residents as well as consultants, thanks for everything.
Goodbye Interns... To Sir Eric, my yosi buddy during my IM days who always gets complete bed rest. Faithful daw kuno!... Sir Allan, hope you're friends with Jackie. Hehehe... To Sir, este, Ma'am Joji, ang reyna ng paghahada. Hehehe. Being with you is so much fun! No dull moments!... and to the rest of the interns, thanks!
Goodbye nurses... whose names we used to confuse. Forgive us!... who knew we smoked but never ratted out on us... who most likely talked about us behind our backs. I wonder what your nickname you gave me? I'm kinda curious.
Goodbye IWs... thanks for the patience to our bossiness and annying demands... Hermano, el bendisyon di amun y el reso para di amun futuro!
Goodbye Friendship, we will miss your yema and spicy peanuts! Yum, yummm...
Goodbye Momsie at Harvest, who provides our daily sustenance for the most part of our clerkship. Thanks for keeping your food safe.
Goodbye PGI Quarters Male... my favorite tambayan, hang-out of those who don't have a life, , nebulizing area, sleeping area, hideaway of scandalous secrets, library, grocery and motel in one... I will definitely miss my home away from home.
Goodbye Medtech interns ... you were all very nice and accomodating to us... Medtech Boy, thanks for the kilig during my Pedia days. I guess I needed that. Unfortunately, you KNOW that you are cute and your cockiness can be vey annoying... To Hema Boy, you have the nicest eyes I have ever seen in a guy. if only one of us got the nerve to talk to each other sooner... Who knows? Hehehe. As if!... Eat plenty and start carrying weights, okay?
And finally, goodbye Maroon 5, I will surely miss you. I will treasure whatever semblance of a boy-girl relationship we had in my mind and think of you fondly always. At least now, there's no more reason for you to keep on playing mind games with me... If we were meant to be, then destiny will find a way. Naks! As if! You're so delusional, Mae...
Fooling Around with Blogthings
While trying to procastinate working on my Opthalmology Report tomorrow on th optic nerve, I came upon this site. Questions are pretty shallow, but I found it cute. Thanks to my blogthings, here are the things I found out today.
You Should Be a Romance Novelist
You see the world as it should be, and this goes double for all matters of the heart.You can find the romance in any situation, and you would make a talented romance story writer...And while you may be a traditional romantic, you're just as likely to be drawn to quirky or dark love stories.As long as it deals with infatuation, heartbreak, and soulmates - you could write it.
What type of writer should you be?
You're an Expert Kisser
You're a kissing pro, but it's all about quality and not quantityYou've perfected your kissing technique and can knock anyone's socks offAnd you're adaptable, giving each partner what they craveWhen it comes down to it, your kisses are truly unforgettable
What kind of kisser are you?
How You Are In Love
You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often.
You tend to give more than take in relationships.
You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.
How are you in love?
Makes you think, huh?
While trying to procastinate working on my Opthalmology Report tomorrow on th optic nerve, I came upon this site. Questions are pretty shallow, but I found it cute. Thanks to my blogthings, here are the things I found out today.
You Should Be a Romance Novelist
You see the world as it should be, and this goes double for all matters of the heart.You can find the romance in any situation, and you would make a talented romance story writer...And while you may be a traditional romantic, you're just as likely to be drawn to quirky or dark love stories.As long as it deals with infatuation, heartbreak, and soulmates - you could write it.
What type of writer should you be?
You're an Expert Kisser
You're a kissing pro, but it's all about quality and not quantityYou've perfected your kissing technique and can knock anyone's socks offAnd you're adaptable, giving each partner what they craveWhen it comes down to it, your kisses are truly unforgettable
What kind of kisser are you?
How You Are In Love
You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often.
You tend to give more than take in relationships.
You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.
How are you in love?
Makes you think, huh?
Clerkship Bloopers
I am going to come clean with my clerkship bloopers today. For all medical students out there, let's face it. Clerkship really is the time to make mistakes. I haven't met any clerk yet who hasn't done at least one blooper during her clerkship. For the past 1 month and 1 week, these are my own confessions...
1. Surgery rotation:
Saw a px classified as Vehicular Accident victim. He came in, ambulatory, and said to have stumbled accidentally while driving a motorcycle. He had several abrasions, nothing too serious, didn't like to lie down on the stretcher and was even able to refuse me when I suggested for him to have an X-ray of his leg. I dressed his wounds with Betadyne and discharged him w/o referring him to our resident. He was a known hypertensive and his BP during the incident was 160/110. According to his wife, a doctor in their health center gave him a few Calcibloc pills which he should take during hypertensive episodes. I advised them to have the px take one and then, discharged the px without even referring him to our resident or to the IM department. A few minutes after, the px came in again, this time carried by his relatives and having a seizure tonic-clonic episode....
Jesus Christ! Why did I not refer the px to our resident? Arghhh!!! Our resident ordered an IV line for the px, infused him with Diazepam and in a few minutes, the man was okay again...
Shiyet... I couldn't face the px's relatives and tried to hide behind the surgery desk. My resident scolded me for not having the px brought to X-ray because it would have bought us some more time. If the px had the episode while he was already at home, he might not have been able to be managed right away. Thank God, he was okay or else, arggggghhhh! I don't even want to think about it.
2. Internal Medicine rotation:
Saw a px complaining of inability to urinate. She has been unable to uriniate for a few hours. This was her first episode. There is no history of fever, chills, dysuria, flank pain, hypogastric pain. Upon examination, her bladder was distended. I called our PGI, who was at Ward 6 that time, to refer the px but he wasn't there. Based on my previous experience during Surgery wherein I encountered the same case except for the fact that the px before was male, when I referred the px to our Surgery PGI, she suggested catheterization. The Internal Medicine PGI was also there that time and she suggested catheterization as well. So, based on my previous experience, I cathetherized the current female px as well.
Big mistake... After having endorsed the px, Dr. Abubakar, the chief resident for IM, saw the px and asked who was responsible for cathetherizing the px. I'm sure if I was there that time, I would have been scolded so many many many times for the mistakes that I did.
Mistake #1: I did not refer the px to the PGI nor to Dr. Miranda, before cathetherizing the px.
Mistake #2: Females are prone to UTI and cathetherization will further promote UTI in the px. I forgot that. Mistake #3: I did not refer the px to the PGI nor to Dr. Miranda.
According to Doc Abubakar, I should have applied warm compress on her hypogastrium instead, before even considering cathetherization. Warm compress? Her freakin' bladder was already distended! Well, okay. Fine.. I am only a clerk. What do I know?
In fairness, I did relieve the px of her ssx and she was thankful to me for it. Hehehe...
Consolacion de bobo... Well, if she does develop UTI, I only hope that occurs next year and not while I am still rotating at Internal Medicine nor at any of my major departments. Hehehe...
Doc Abubakar hasn't talked to me nor to my partner about that case yet. I'm still waiting for the long lecture. Hope that ax never falls and he forgets about it... Ha! As if! I'm sure that incident already has a corresponding demerit. Wish me luck! =)
I am going to come clean with my clerkship bloopers today. For all medical students out there, let's face it. Clerkship really is the time to make mistakes. I haven't met any clerk yet who hasn't done at least one blooper during her clerkship. For the past 1 month and 1 week, these are my own confessions...
1. Surgery rotation:
Saw a px classified as Vehicular Accident victim. He came in, ambulatory, and said to have stumbled accidentally while driving a motorcycle. He had several abrasions, nothing too serious, didn't like to lie down on the stretcher and was even able to refuse me when I suggested for him to have an X-ray of his leg. I dressed his wounds with Betadyne and discharged him w/o referring him to our resident. He was a known hypertensive and his BP during the incident was 160/110. According to his wife, a doctor in their health center gave him a few Calcibloc pills which he should take during hypertensive episodes. I advised them to have the px take one and then, discharged the px without even referring him to our resident or to the IM department. A few minutes after, the px came in again, this time carried by his relatives and having a seizure tonic-clonic episode....
Jesus Christ! Why did I not refer the px to our resident? Arghhh!!! Our resident ordered an IV line for the px, infused him with Diazepam and in a few minutes, the man was okay again...
Shiyet... I couldn't face the px's relatives and tried to hide behind the surgery desk. My resident scolded me for not having the px brought to X-ray because it would have bought us some more time. If the px had the episode while he was already at home, he might not have been able to be managed right away. Thank God, he was okay or else, arggggghhhh! I don't even want to think about it.
2. Internal Medicine rotation:
Saw a px complaining of inability to urinate. She has been unable to uriniate for a few hours. This was her first episode. There is no history of fever, chills, dysuria, flank pain, hypogastric pain. Upon examination, her bladder was distended. I called our PGI, who was at Ward 6 that time, to refer the px but he wasn't there. Based on my previous experience during Surgery wherein I encountered the same case except for the fact that the px before was male, when I referred the px to our Surgery PGI, she suggested catheterization. The Internal Medicine PGI was also there that time and she suggested catheterization as well. So, based on my previous experience, I cathetherized the current female px as well.
Big mistake... After having endorsed the px, Dr. Abubakar, the chief resident for IM, saw the px and asked who was responsible for cathetherizing the px. I'm sure if I was there that time, I would have been scolded so many many many times for the mistakes that I did.
Mistake #1: I did not refer the px to the PGI nor to Dr. Miranda, before cathetherizing the px.
Mistake #2: Females are prone to UTI and cathetherization will further promote UTI in the px. I forgot that. Mistake #3: I did not refer the px to the PGI nor to Dr. Miranda.
According to Doc Abubakar, I should have applied warm compress on her hypogastrium instead, before even considering cathetherization. Warm compress? Her freakin' bladder was already distended! Well, okay. Fine.. I am only a clerk. What do I know?
In fairness, I did relieve the px of her ssx and she was thankful to me for it. Hehehe...
Consolacion de bobo... Well, if she does develop UTI, I only hope that occurs next year and not while I am still rotating at Internal Medicine nor at any of my major departments. Hehehe...
Doc Abubakar hasn't talked to me nor to my partner about that case yet. I'm still waiting for the long lecture. Hope that ax never falls and he forgets about it... Ha! As if! I'm sure that incident already has a corresponding demerit. Wish me luck! =)
Freeeeeaaaaky...
Very weird things are happening at the Obi-Gyne Department. Although I am a Surgery clerk as of now, because the Obi-Gyne Department is just one wall away from ours in the Emergency Room, I had the opportunity to witness the most strangest things yesterday.
A woman, gravida 3 ( meaning she has been pregnant three imes already) gave birth right then and there on the floor of the Emergency Room. Under ordinary circumstances, women immediately about to give birth are initially seen at the ER-ObiGyne Department and rushed immediately to the Delivery Room at the next building via stretcher. This woman came to the ER-ObiGyne, talked for a few minutes to the ObiGyne clerk and in the few minutes that the clerk turned her back to the woman, she kneeled on the floor, and right then and there, she was already trying to push her baby out. Just as the clerk began yelling "Hermano, ang stretcher!", amniotic fluid and fecal material was coming out of the woman. The worried father put his hand out between the woman's thighs and tried to catch their baby. The next thing we heard was the sound of the newborn baby crying, "Ungaaaaaa... ungaaaaa.... ungaaaa...."
The whole thing was damn over in less than three minutes.
The next thing I knew, the baby was wrapped in clean rags (the same rags, we Surgery clerks use to clean our bloodied patients, hehehe...) and brought to the Pedia Department for incubation. Because the baby was delivered in the ER instead of the Delivery Room, it is considered unsterile and therefore, not qualified to be put together with the other neonates at the nursery. The mother was put into a stretcher, her umbilical cord hanging with a straight clamp on its end between her thighs, and brought into the Inspection Room for the manual removal of the placenta.
Cool. But at the same time, gross...
A few hours after, as I was trying to review for the endorsements tomorrow, Ice, the Obi-Gyne clerk on night duty called me and showed me the freakiest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. As she pulled me into the Obi-Gyne Inspection room, I thought she was going to show me a cute newborn baby.
Well, it was a baby all right.
Lying in the middle of the disposable gloves wrapper was an 11-day old newly aborted fetus, taken fresh from the uterus. Its mother was still lying right there in lithotomy position... It was, like I said, incredibly freaky. You can actually see its eyes (or something that resembled it) and limbs. It reminded me of those grade school days when I used to go to the Adoration Chapel at ICES and lining the hallway to the chapel were various posters on abortion, including graphic photos of aborted fetuses in various months of gestation.
Hmmm... at this rate, I'm kinda looking forward on to what other freaky things will be in store for me during my own rotation as medical clerk at Obi-Gyne Department on February next year. Hehehe... So, NOT!
Very weird things are happening at the Obi-Gyne Department. Although I am a Surgery clerk as of now, because the Obi-Gyne Department is just one wall away from ours in the Emergency Room, I had the opportunity to witness the most strangest things yesterday.
A woman, gravida 3 ( meaning she has been pregnant three imes already) gave birth right then and there on the floor of the Emergency Room. Under ordinary circumstances, women immediately about to give birth are initially seen at the ER-ObiGyne Department and rushed immediately to the Delivery Room at the next building via stretcher. This woman came to the ER-ObiGyne, talked for a few minutes to the ObiGyne clerk and in the few minutes that the clerk turned her back to the woman, she kneeled on the floor, and right then and there, she was already trying to push her baby out. Just as the clerk began yelling "Hermano, ang stretcher!", amniotic fluid and fecal material was coming out of the woman. The worried father put his hand out between the woman's thighs and tried to catch their baby. The next thing we heard was the sound of the newborn baby crying, "Ungaaaaaa... ungaaaaa.... ungaaaa...."
The whole thing was damn over in less than three minutes.
The next thing I knew, the baby was wrapped in clean rags (the same rags, we Surgery clerks use to clean our bloodied patients, hehehe...) and brought to the Pedia Department for incubation. Because the baby was delivered in the ER instead of the Delivery Room, it is considered unsterile and therefore, not qualified to be put together with the other neonates at the nursery. The mother was put into a stretcher, her umbilical cord hanging with a straight clamp on its end between her thighs, and brought into the Inspection Room for the manual removal of the placenta.
Cool. But at the same time, gross...
A few hours after, as I was trying to review for the endorsements tomorrow, Ice, the Obi-Gyne clerk on night duty called me and showed me the freakiest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. As she pulled me into the Obi-Gyne Inspection room, I thought she was going to show me a cute newborn baby.
Well, it was a baby all right.
Lying in the middle of the disposable gloves wrapper was an 11-day old newly aborted fetus, taken fresh from the uterus. Its mother was still lying right there in lithotomy position... It was, like I said, incredibly freaky. You can actually see its eyes (or something that resembled it) and limbs. It reminded me of those grade school days when I used to go to the Adoration Chapel at ICES and lining the hallway to the chapel were various posters on abortion, including graphic photos of aborted fetuses in various months of gestation.
Hmmm... at this rate, I'm kinda looking forward on to what other freaky things will be in store for me during my own rotation as medical clerk at Obi-Gyne Department on February next year. Hehehe... So, NOT!
Mr. X
I was never comfortable with the concept of death.
Yes, I dabbled on thoughts of suicide and dying young during my turbulent adolescent years, like any other ordinary teenager. But hello? No one at the age of 15 is really that serious about it!
As a matter of fact, I am afraid of looking at dead people inside open caskets. For many years, I have managed to maintain a two-feet distance between me and the casket whenever I am dragged to look at corpses inside caskets during wakes. I have also managed to maintain a brave face whenever faced with a cadaver during Anatomy Lab, instead of running away from the room in a speed of 80 miles/hour.
But this was obviously something that I had to face.
At 4:00 this morning, for the first time in my life, I had seen a man die right in front of me...
An unknown elderly man that we had named Mr.X was brought to the ER. There was no watcher with him and he was said to be found, lying in the midle of the road, a supposedly victim of hit and run. As the crowd of student nurses dispersed from around his stretcher, I finally saw him in all his tragic splendor: Both legs were splinted, from the hip to the ankles, a variety of wounds decorated his skin like unwanted medals of valor, and with gurgling sounds coming out of his throat, fresh blood oozed out of his mouth like a red water fountain. Both pupils were dilated, blood pressure was 20 palpable and his heart rate was barely perceptible.
We did massive suctioning, intubation, Ambu-bagging, even CPR yet despite our attempts to keep him alive, eventually, he died in the E.R. This man, who could be someone's grandfather, father or husband, has died alone with no relative to see him for the last time and with no name to identify him in his death certificate. For all we know, some daughter or wife or granddaughter is looking for him right now and they aren't even aware that he is already dead.
I have never witnessed a sorrier event than that.
Mr. X was now nothing but a corpse lying under a white sheet. I kept thinking how bad it must feel to die, without a name, without your family, without an identity.
Mr. X, may you rest in peace.
I was never comfortable with the concept of death.Yes, I dabbled on thoughts of suicide and dying young during my turbulent adolescent years, like any other ordinary teenager. But hello? No one at the age of 15 is really that serious about it!
As a matter of fact, I am afraid of looking at dead people inside open caskets. For many years, I have managed to maintain a two-feet distance between me and the casket whenever I am dragged to look at corpses inside caskets during wakes. I have also managed to maintain a brave face whenever faced with a cadaver during Anatomy Lab, instead of running away from the room in a speed of 80 miles/hour.
But this was obviously something that I had to face.
At 4:00 this morning, for the first time in my life, I had seen a man die right in front of me...
An unknown elderly man that we had named Mr.X was brought to the ER. There was no watcher with him and he was said to be found, lying in the midle of the road, a supposedly victim of hit and run. As the crowd of student nurses dispersed from around his stretcher, I finally saw him in all his tragic splendor: Both legs were splinted, from the hip to the ankles, a variety of wounds decorated his skin like unwanted medals of valor, and with gurgling sounds coming out of his throat, fresh blood oozed out of his mouth like a red water fountain. Both pupils were dilated, blood pressure was 20 palpable and his heart rate was barely perceptible.
We did massive suctioning, intubation, Ambu-bagging, even CPR yet despite our attempts to keep him alive, eventually, he died in the E.R. This man, who could be someone's grandfather, father or husband, has died alone with no relative to see him for the last time and with no name to identify him in his death certificate. For all we know, some daughter or wife or granddaughter is looking for him right now and they aren't even aware that he is already dead.
I have never witnessed a sorrier event than that.
Mr. X was now nothing but a corpse lying under a white sheet. I kept thinking how bad it must feel to die, without a name, without your family, without an identity.
Mr. X, may you rest in peace.
Top 10 Ways to Kill Time during the 24-hour duty at the ER
Under ordinary circumstances, life for a clerk assigned at the ER-Surgery Dep't is TOXIC. We provide first-line management for those who come at the Emergency Room due to animal bites, stab wounds, trauma, falls, vehicular accidents, for those who are allegedly mauled, raped, beaten etcetera. But that Friday evening, business was really slow and by 1:30 in the morning, we were freeto do whatever we wanted. Sitti, my team partner and I went to sleep for about two hours at the OPD-Surgery room, afer which we couldn't stand the cold anymore and so we decided to hang-out at the ER instead. The clerks from the other departments were there as well, with nothing to do, since it was a pretty slow night for them as well... except for Ice, from the Obi-Gyne Department. Blame it on all women who decided to conceive a month afer Valentine's Day...Anyway, I decided to compile the Top 10 best things to do at the ER, as a guieline for future clerks who will be assigned to do 24-hour duty soon and will have the luxury of a slow night. Enjoy!
1. Fool around with the weighing scale. Make girls and very vain guys cry when they start weighing themselves and see that they have gained an additional 20 pounds.
2. Eat the lunch and dinner that you have skipped the night before. Follow-it up with a very early breakfast just in case you won't have time to eat anymore in the morning with all the incoming patients.
3. Try catching Hepatitis B and AIDs by washing the used instuments at the sink without wearing any gloves. And on that note...
4. Unsterilize the sterilized instruments by secretly inserting your unwashed hand inside the aseptic trays.
5. Put your bare feet up on the table just because your resident doctor is not there to scold you from doing so.
6. Make fun of the resident who scolded you the night before.
7. Practice voodoo on the resident who scolded you the night before.
8. Practice flirting on the resident who scolded you the night before. Who knows? It just might work!
9. Try to escape for a few minutes and buy some caffeinated drinks outside the hospital. A can of Diet Coke costs P15. The price of few minutes of fresh un-Lysoled air: priceless.
10. Sleep. Best thing to do!
Under ordinary circumstances, life for a clerk assigned at the ER-Surgery Dep't is TOXIC. We provide first-line management for those who come at the Emergency Room due to animal bites, stab wounds, trauma, falls, vehicular accidents, for those who are allegedly mauled, raped, beaten etcetera. But that Friday evening, business was really slow and by 1:30 in the morning, we were freeto do whatever we wanted. Sitti, my team partner and I went to sleep for about two hours at the OPD-Surgery room, afer which we couldn't stand the cold anymore and so we decided to hang-out at the ER instead. The clerks from the other departments were there as well, with nothing to do, since it was a pretty slow night for them as well... except for Ice, from the Obi-Gyne Department. Blame it on all women who decided to conceive a month afer Valentine's Day...Anyway, I decided to compile the Top 10 best things to do at the ER, as a guieline for future clerks who will be assigned to do 24-hour duty soon and will have the luxury of a slow night. Enjoy!
1. Fool around with the weighing scale. Make girls and very vain guys cry when they start weighing themselves and see that they have gained an additional 20 pounds.
2. Eat the lunch and dinner that you have skipped the night before. Follow-it up with a very early breakfast just in case you won't have time to eat anymore in the morning with all the incoming patients.
3. Try catching Hepatitis B and AIDs by washing the used instuments at the sink without wearing any gloves. And on that note...
4. Unsterilize the sterilized instruments by secretly inserting your unwashed hand inside the aseptic trays.
5. Put your bare feet up on the table just because your resident doctor is not there to scold you from doing so.
6. Make fun of the resident who scolded you the night before.
7. Practice voodoo on the resident who scolded you the night before.
8. Practice flirting on the resident who scolded you the night before. Who knows? It just might work!
9. Try to escape for a few minutes and buy some caffeinated drinks outside the hospital. A can of Diet Coke costs P15. The price of few minutes of fresh un-Lysoled air: priceless.
10. Sleep. Best thing to do!
S.O.A.P.
Arevalo, Mae Angelica
24 y/o female
Putik, Zamboanga City
S:
(+) fatigue, varicose veins, and sleepiness x 8 hours during first day of clerkship, feeling dumb more than ever for not being able to know what duct is at the submandibular gland (Am I supposed to know that?), feeling stupid for wearing my paporma shoes with the 2.5 inch-heels, with associated (+) weight loss from all that walking and running around
O:
(+) drooping eyes (ano to, ptosis?) from lack of sleep
(+) varicosities on (B) feet from standing too long
(+) erythematous soles of (B) feet
A:
Burnt-out clerk on her first day of clerkship; ready for second day of torture the ER on her first 24-hour duty
P:
1. Bring scrub suit, water, baon, lots of Extra Joss and Baby Schwartz.
2. Bring candy to combat hypoglycemia.
3. Try to get on Doc Alawaddin's good side. Sharpen your flirting skills.
4. Sleep early tonight.
5. Eat plenty.
6. Don't forget to poop on a vial for the required fecalysis tomorrow.
Arevalo, Mae Angelica
24 y/o female
Putik, Zamboanga City
S:
(+) fatigue, varicose veins, and sleepiness x 8 hours during first day of clerkship, feeling dumb more than ever for not being able to know what duct is at the submandibular gland (Am I supposed to know that?), feeling stupid for wearing my paporma shoes with the 2.5 inch-heels, with associated (+) weight loss from all that walking and running around
O:
(+) drooping eyes (ano to, ptosis?) from lack of sleep
(+) varicosities on (B) feet from standing too long
(+) erythematous soles of (B) feet
A:
Burnt-out clerk on her first day of clerkship; ready for second day of torture the ER on her first 24-hour duty
P:
1. Bring scrub suit, water, baon, lots of Extra Joss and Baby Schwartz.
2. Bring candy to combat hypoglycemia.
3. Try to get on Doc Alawaddin's good side. Sharpen your flirting skills.
4. Sleep early tonight.
5. Eat plenty.
6. Don't forget to poop on a vial for the required fecalysis tomorrow.
War freak
My mom's a war freak...
In another yelling match yesterday afternoon, somewhere in the middle of the argument, I had come to realize that the way my mom was yelling at me was the same way I talked back to my ex-boyfriend, WrongAtAllLevels, whenever we were arguing.
I didn't like that at all...
Does that mean that the reason why my Mom and I keep arguing is because we're too different from each other, just like with my ex? Or because we were too alike?
If your loved one brings out the worst version of yourself, then, take my word and get the hell out of there already! =)
In another yelling match yesterday afternoon, somewhere in the middle of the argument, I had come to realize that the way my mom was yelling at me was the same way I talked back to my ex-boyfriend, WrongAtAllLevels, whenever we were arguing.
I didn't like that at all...
Does that mean that the reason why my Mom and I keep arguing is because we're too different from each other, just like with my ex? Or because we were too alike?
If your loved one brings out the worst version of yourself, then, take my word and get the hell out of there already! =)
Hey, joe... wana heb sam pan? Part 2
Having a foreigner in the house and having to speak to your housemates in English most of the time, I noticed that some Tagalog and Chavacano expressions simply lose their meaning when translated to English. Or kung hinde, ampangit lang talagang pakinggan. Take a look at the following examples:
Grabe! (Too much!)
Magsaing ka na, Gie! (Start boiling rice, Gie!)
Huyyy... huwag namang ganyan... (Heyyy... don't be like that...)
Asiwa talaga tingnan. (It looks very uncomfortable? Ugly?)
Pucha! (...Huh?)
Hirap talagang mag-English...
Having a foreigner in the house and having to speak to your housemates in English most of the time, I noticed that some Tagalog and Chavacano expressions simply lose their meaning when translated to English. Or kung hinde, ampangit lang talagang pakinggan. Take a look at the following examples:
Grabe! (Too much!)
Magsaing ka na, Gie! (Start boiling rice, Gie!)
Huyyy... huwag namang ganyan... (Heyyy... don't be like that...)
Asiwa talaga tingnan. (It looks very uncomfortable? Ugly?)
Pucha! (...Huh?)
Hirap talagang mag-English...
Hey, joe... wana heb sam pan?
I have never talked to an alien before.
Excluding, of course, that short conversation (as in, very short, with me saying "Hi" and him saying "Hello") with an American blonde named Josh who became my classmate during Grade Six at ICES for about a week, I think. If Im not wrong, I think he sat beside me (Flashback music, please...)
Bwahahaha... Fast forward to today...
For five days, a Chinese-Indian-Filipino medical student born and raised in America named Gene Kwan lived with us at the Silucap BHS. Why? To learn daw. Tsk, tsk, tsk... Can you say, culture shock?! If he wasn't such a "cowboy" and a Boy Scout, I'm sure the whole experience would have been something like joining GMA's Extra Challenge for him... Nice going, Gene. Are you serious?!
He was pretty nice for a foreigner. We all had our own misconceptions of what he'd be like, before he even stepped foot in Silucap. Feel free to match the person with their expectation. The prize?... Don't count on it!
- Janet - Noy - Mae - Ice - Babes - Elgie - Joseph -
a. He's as big as a Refrigerator
b. He's very choosy when it comes to his food. He might not eat rice at all.
c. He looks like William Hung
d. He has polio and he's in a wheelchair
e. He's very cocky. Aren't foreigners overconfident?
f. He's a pervert who likes to fondle women in public
g. He's really cute!!!!
Contrary to what we expected, he was smart, funny, religious, very observant, very stringy when it comes to money, gentleman, very protective and kinda endearing, like an older brother that you had to take care of. He was a little wary at first but he soon warmed up to us. His personality is like a combination between Noy, Doc Lucky and Madz.
He wasn't any of the first six guesses. As for the seventh, kindly ask Allen na lang... Yiheee... Uyyy... Your one week-sary is soon coming up, Len! Saging and Coconut! Hehehe...
One thing you do realize with having a foreigner in the house is that you had to speak in English
a lot and it is very difficult to be spontaneous during conversations with him. You have to constantly be thinking of every word that comes out of your mouth. And since we are a bunch who love to tease each other a lot, the thought of having to do so to him in English makes us stop, shut up and be content with listening to the sound of crickets instead.
On his first day alone with us, we ran out of English words to use. Hehehe...
I have never talked to an alien before.
Excluding, of course, that short conversation (as in, very short, with me saying "Hi" and him saying "Hello") with an American blonde named Josh who became my classmate during Grade Six at ICES for about a week, I think. If Im not wrong, I think he sat beside me (Flashback music, please...)
Bwahahaha... Fast forward to today...
For five days, a Chinese-Indian-Filipino medical student born and raised in America named Gene Kwan lived with us at the Silucap BHS. Why? To learn daw. Tsk, tsk, tsk... Can you say, culture shock?! If he wasn't such a "cowboy" and a Boy Scout, I'm sure the whole experience would have been something like joining GMA's Extra Challenge for him... Nice going, Gene. Are you serious?!
He was pretty nice for a foreigner. We all had our own misconceptions of what he'd be like, before he even stepped foot in Silucap. Feel free to match the person with their expectation. The prize?... Don't count on it!
- Janet - Noy - Mae - Ice - Babes - Elgie - Joseph -
a. He's as big as a Refrigerator
b. He's very choosy when it comes to his food. He might not eat rice at all.
c. He looks like William Hung
d. He has polio and he's in a wheelchair
e. He's very cocky. Aren't foreigners overconfident?
f. He's a pervert who likes to fondle women in public
g. He's really cute!!!!
Contrary to what we expected, he was smart, funny, religious, very observant, very stringy when it comes to money, gentleman, very protective and kinda endearing, like an older brother that you had to take care of. He was a little wary at first but he soon warmed up to us. His personality is like a combination between Noy, Doc Lucky and Madz.He wasn't any of the first six guesses. As for the seventh, kindly ask Allen na lang... Yiheee... Uyyy... Your one week-sary is soon coming up, Len! Saging and Coconut! Hehehe...
One thing you do realize with having a foreigner in the house is that you had to speak in English
a lot and it is very difficult to be spontaneous during conversations with him. You have to constantly be thinking of every word that comes out of your mouth. And since we are a bunch who love to tease each other a lot, the thought of having to do so to him in English makes us stop, shut up and be content with listening to the sound of crickets instead.On his first day alone with us, we ran out of English words to use. Hehehe...
I'M BAAAACCCKKKK!!!!!
Coming home from our community immersion at Liloy, Zamboanga del Norte, I have spent a big majority of the past few days infront of our PC, surfing the net and updating with my favorite sites. I missed the Internet so much! Three weeks without it and I'm still compensating for the lost hours until now.
Don't get me wrong. Liloy is nice and the company is nicer. But the Internet is my latest addiction and I gotta have my daily fix. Hehehe...
Of course, not that I didn't make any attempts to get connected to the Web while I was there. Because I certainly did. Or at least, tried to... Back in Liloy, I went to the one and only computer shop that they have - whose name will remain anonymous - and tried surfing the net. Two hours and P60 later, the only thing I was able to do was read some of my e-mails at Yahoo and Friendster. Emphasis on SOME... I wasn't able to reply to any of the messages, do any research work nor check out my other favorite sites. I checked it out and the computer shop had a wireless connection, with a fluctuating speed of about 11-14 Kbps. I mean, come on! I was just wasting my time and my money in there.
It's so nice to be back home again, in the comforts of my own home and with our PC with the Internet connection! That's what I call "Home sweet home".
Coming home from our community immersion at Liloy, Zamboanga del Norte, I have spent a big majority of the past few days infront of our PC, surfing the net and updating with my favorite sites. I missed the Internet so much! Three weeks without it and I'm still compensating for the lost hours until now.
Don't get me wrong. Liloy is nice and the company is nicer. But the Internet is my latest addiction and I gotta have my daily fix. Hehehe...
Of course, not that I didn't make any attempts to get connected to the Web while I was there. Because I certainly did. Or at least, tried to... Back in Liloy, I went to the one and only computer shop that they have - whose name will remain anonymous - and tried surfing the net. Two hours and P60 later, the only thing I was able to do was read some of my e-mails at Yahoo and Friendster. Emphasis on SOME... I wasn't able to reply to any of the messages, do any research work nor check out my other favorite sites. I checked it out and the computer shop had a wireless connection, with a fluctuating speed of about 11-14 Kbps. I mean, come on! I was just wasting my time and my money in there.
It's so nice to be back home again, in the comforts of my own home and with our PC with the Internet connection! That's what I call "Home sweet home".
You, me, a pitcher of gin mango and good conversation...
There is nothing like killing time with friends when you all know you should be doing something else. It's rewarding, if not liberating to immerse one's self in a few hours of meaningful, and occasionally non-sense, conversations, cooccooning (is my spelling correct?) yourselves in each other's company, forgetting about the demands of the outside world for at least a few hours: the impending Gender and Sexuality exam, the lack of sleep, the uncertain scholarship funds, the ex-boyfriends. In those few hours, lounging in the comforts of the air-conditioned classroom/dorm stockroom, drowning ourselves with gin mango (which I first thought was pineapple juice), we, eleven future doctors and one former future-doctor-now-turned-deejay, finally found enlightenment. So now we raise our glass, full of gin mango, and toast towards the true things that are worth celebrating about:
1. Losing by 3% in a debate... Woohoo!!! Not bad, given our competition. Congrats to Ice, Ella and Shaf! I'm just happy it's done and over with.
2. Ella and Elgie, both late and arrived TOGETHER at Greenfields for the class lunch... Hmmm... where'd you go guys? Out for some quickie? Hehehe...
3. That we had John Lloyd Cruz in our midst... Uyyy... feeling!
4. That JR isn't an easy boy. Janet will have to work really hard to get him... Unfortunately, Janet is practically abou to lose he patience with him... "Bungul man gat este si JR, oh." (You're so deaf, JR)"... So, J... I thought you liked older women?
5. Breaking up with a boyfriend, when the relationship was considered null and void, in the first place because of FRAUD... because he is, ahemmm... GAY?... Stop crying, Sitt! Noy's there for you anyway!
6. Not breaking up with a boyfriend, even when he might be married to already or living with someone else, even when he hasn't texted you at all in a week, even when you can't contact his number... Janet, I told you. Get the f**k away fom that relationship already! No wonder JR doesn't want to take you seriously. You might only leave him once your boyfriend starts crawling back to you...
7. That when the cat is away, the mouse will play... Babes, ha? Behave!
8. That it is still possible to deejay at RX when you're drunk, without your listeners even noticing it... Thanks to Astring-o-sol. Hehehe. Go Mading!
9. Cocoy... "artistahin pag long-hair"
10. Cocoy, best guy in class to fall in love with, according to Allen... Hehehe... good catch baya!
11. Mae and Dara, the energizer bunnies... Already more than 24 hours awake, and still going, and going, and going... Ate She, their shabu supplier!
12. Extra Joss actually works!
13. That the class should make it a goal to find Jackie a boyfriend.
14. That Ruzenda should give Cocoy a chance. It's not his fault that he looks funny that Ruzenda doesn't take him seiously.
15. That the new Filipino-Chinese foreign exchange student from the US, who will be staying with our group in Silucap, might look like WILLIAM HUNG...
Special mention to Elgie, Jackie, Cocoy, Dara, Madz, Allen, JP, Sitti, JR, Janet, Moh and Ice (pahabol!)... that was fun, guys! Let's do it again, after the exam! Good luck to all of us!... P.S. Prepare P300 and the air-conditioned classroom at Jackie's. Hahaha... Part Two after exams, okay? Everybody's invited!!! Bring beer, okay? I can't drink gin too fast. I pass out too soon. Hehehe...
There is nothing like killing time with friends when you all know you should be doing something else. It's rewarding, if not liberating to immerse one's self in a few hours of meaningful, and occasionally non-sense, conversations, cooccooning (is my spelling correct?) yourselves in each other's company, forgetting about the demands of the outside world for at least a few hours: the impending Gender and Sexuality exam, the lack of sleep, the uncertain scholarship funds, the ex-boyfriends. In those few hours, lounging in the comforts of the air-conditioned classroom/dorm stockroom, drowning ourselves with gin mango (which I first thought was pineapple juice), we, eleven future doctors and one former future-doctor-now-turned-deejay, finally found enlightenment. So now we raise our glass, full of gin mango, and toast towards the true things that are worth celebrating about:
1. Losing by 3% in a debate... Woohoo!!! Not bad, given our competition. Congrats to Ice, Ella and Shaf! I'm just happy it's done and over with.
2. Ella and Elgie, both late and arrived TOGETHER at Greenfields for the class lunch... Hmmm... where'd you go guys? Out for some quickie? Hehehe...
3. That we had John Lloyd Cruz in our midst... Uyyy... feeling!
4. That JR isn't an easy boy. Janet will have to work really hard to get him... Unfortunately, Janet is practically abou to lose he patience with him... "Bungul man gat este si JR, oh." (You're so deaf, JR)"... So, J... I thought you liked older women?5. Breaking up with a boyfriend, when the relationship was considered null and void, in the first place because of FRAUD... because he is, ahemmm... GAY?... Stop crying, Sitt! Noy's there for you anyway!
6. Not breaking up with a boyfriend, even when he might be married to already or living with someone else, even when he hasn't texted you at all in a week, even when you can't contact his number... Janet, I told you. Get the f**k away fom that relationship already! No wonder JR doesn't want to take you seriously. You might only leave him once your boyfriend starts crawling back to you...
7. That when the cat is away, the mouse will play... Babes, ha? Behave!
8. That it is still possible to deejay at RX when you're drunk, without your listeners even noticing it... Thanks to Astring-o-sol. Hehehe. Go Mading!
9. Cocoy... "artistahin pag long-hair"10. Cocoy, best guy in class to fall in love with, according to Allen... Hehehe... good catch baya!
11. Mae and Dara, the energizer bunnies... Already more than 24 hours awake, and still going, and going, and going... Ate She, their shabu supplier!
12. Extra Joss actually works!
13. That the class should make it a goal to find Jackie a boyfriend.
14. That Ruzenda should give Cocoy a chance. It's not his fault that he looks funny that Ruzenda doesn't take him seiously.
15. That the new Filipino-Chinese foreign exchange student from the US, who will be staying with our group in Silucap, might look like WILLIAM HUNG...
Special mention to Elgie, Jackie, Cocoy, Dara, Madz, Allen, JP, Sitti, JR, Janet, Moh and Ice (pahabol!)... that was fun, guys! Let's do it again, after the exam! Good luck to all of us!... P.S. Prepare P300 and the air-conditioned classroom at Jackie's. Hahaha... Part Two after exams, okay? Everybody's invited!!! Bring beer, okay? I can't drink gin too fast. I pass out too soon. Hehehe...
Passed!
I passed Hematology and Immunology!!! Thank god! I don't even know my grade yet but a friend said I passed and I wasn't one of the 7 people who failed so I'm already contented with that. I couldn't believe it! That was the like the hardest exam I have taken in my entire three years in medical school. Its Difficulty Factor was like a combination between our Trauma and Renal Exams. God must really want me to be a doctor because he actualy helped me pass. Thank you Lord! =) I'll try not to disappoint you.
Our last exam is on Gender and Sexuality and then clerkship, here I come!!!
I passed Hematology and Immunology!!! Thank god! I don't even know my grade yet but a friend said I passed and I wasn't one of the 7 people who failed so I'm already contented with that. I couldn't believe it! That was the like the hardest exam I have taken in my entire three years in medical school. Its Difficulty Factor was like a combination between our Trauma and Renal Exams. God must really want me to be a doctor because he actualy helped me pass. Thank you Lord! =) I'll try not to disappoint you.
Our last exam is on Gender and Sexuality and then clerkship, here I come!!!
Medical Fools
Just had the WORST exam in my medical school history. I might probably receive my very first remedial exam since I got into medical school. I found myself guessing the answers to topics which I skipped studying because we thought they weren't going to come out in the exam. Even my classmates were baffled with the exam. None of our facilitators hinted of stuff like Leukemia or Multiple Myeloma to come out in the exam. We looked like the biggest fools! Why the hell is Doc Cris making us suffer this much?!!! Darn it! I don't plan on being a specialist on Hematology and Immunology anyway. They really just aren't my kind of thing.
Well, like Elgie and Ella were singing a while ago, "There can be miracles... If you believe..."
Just had the WORST exam in my medical school history. I might probably receive my very first remedial exam since I got into medical school. I found myself guessing the answers to topics which I skipped studying because we thought they weren't going to come out in the exam. Even my classmates were baffled with the exam. None of our facilitators hinted of stuff like Leukemia or Multiple Myeloma to come out in the exam. We looked like the biggest fools! Why the hell is Doc Cris making us suffer this much?!!! Darn it! I don't plan on being a specialist on Hematology and Immunology anyway. They really just aren't my kind of thing.
Well, like Elgie and Ella were singing a while ago, "There can be miracles... If you believe..."
Clueless
My parents are so clueless! I had never told them the actual reason why my ex-boyfriend and I broke up because:
1.) My lovelife is my own friggin' business
2.) I don't want to hear them say, "I told you so."
3.) Even if I tell them the truth about WrongAtAllLevels cheating on me, in the end, I will still be the one who will hear their loooooong lecture about waiting for the right guy, not taking your boyfriend seriously when you're still studying and of course, pre-marital sex.
For the last few days, I have recently been going out a lot at night because a few of my highschool classmates are currently back in Zamboanga. Except for the occasional reminders not to go home late, I never heard them say anything bad about my frequent going out. It was only yesterday when I found out from my sister that my parents have been incessantly nagging her about telling them the reason why WrongAtAllLevels and I broke up. It seems that, for them, my frequent barhopping was some kind of defense mechanism. They believed that I don't actually enjoy going out a lot at night and that my recently frequent barhopping was apparently my way of trying to prove something to my ex-boyfriend.
My Gaaaaaddddd! After all the times that they had scolded me for all the screw-ups that I've done, it amazes me that my parents still don't know me at all. FYI, one, although I like to stay at home sometimes, basically I still love going out at night, especially with friends. The only reason why I didn't do so for the past few years was because my ex-boyfriend didn't like it. Two, it's been more than two months since WrongAtAllLevels and I broke up. My actions don't have anything to do with him anymore. Three, despite the absence of a boyfriend, I am happier now. Why should I waste my time being defensive or trying to prove anything to my ex-boyfriend when we're not even talking to each other at all?
Sigh... my parents are so clueless... Strangely, I love them anyway.
10 Things People MUST KNOW About Me
A lot of years have passed. I am now 25 years old. I have gone to different schools, lived in different environments, met different people, hanged out with different friends. As they say, the only thing constant in this world is change. Through the help of technology, I am once again keeping in touch with people I have barely seen in years. Of course, it is a given that I am probably not the same person as they used to know. Being the obsessive-compulsive person that I now am, I have made up a list of things that will give people an idea of the person that I now am, since the last time that they saw me. This is for all my friends whom I haven’t seen for a long time. I miss you guys…
1. SPORTS HAS NEVER INTERESTED ME.
I have no competitive bone at all in my entire body. Watching basketball actually bores me… Sorry, Dingdong. Now, you know that I was just faking the excitement whenever I was cheering for you during your basketball games back when we were still dating. Sorry…
2. I AM FRUSTRATED WRITER.
I like writing short stories. I usually base the characters on people I know. I do admit that my work is not really that good enough to be published, my writing style is still very unrefined and my English is not that eloquent but I just enjoy seeing the people I know immortalized on paper, in plots and situations that I want them to be in…
3. MY BIGGEST REGRET IN LIFE IS GIVING UP A 10-YEAR FRIENDSHIP WITH A VERY CLOSE MALE FRIEND BECAUSE OF A STUPID BOYFRIEND WHO FELT THREATENED BY MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM...
Sorry, Gaf! You were right and I was wrong. Wherever you are, let's be friends again, please…
4. WHENEVER I BREAK UP WITH A GUY, I NEVER EVER TRY TO GET BACK WITH HIM.
For me, closed doors should always stay closed.
5. I HATE MESS.
If I was in Friends, I would be Monica. I can’t watch TV if the living room is untidy. I never study without arranging the things in my desk. And since I share a bedroom with my sister, I always yell at her if she never puts her things in the proper place.
6. I LOVE MOVIES.
I try to watch at least one movie a day. Cable TV is my new bestfriend.
7. My favorite foods are HOPIA MONGO CUBE, TUKNENENG, SALTED EGG WITH TOMATOES, FRIED CHICKEN SKIN, BANANA HEART SALAD, MCDONALD'S FRENCHFRIES and MUSHROOM BURGER AT BURGER KING.
I’m very “cowboy” when it comes to my food. Fine dining cuisine just isn’t for me.
8. I AM APOLITICAL.
Politics doesn’t particularly interest me. I have never voted nor registered during election... But, if anyone of my friends is planning to run for office, I would gladly register at Comelec and vote for him/her.
9. I HAVE BAD LUCK WITH MY CHOICE OF BOYFRIENDS.
Enough said.
10. Last but certainly not the least, I have drank alcohol plenty of times but I HAVE ONLY BEEN DRUNK TWICE.
The first time was at Kaye’s house with my highschool classmates and the second time at Boalan Resort during an overnight. Strangely, Paul, my bestfriend, was around during both times. There must be something about him that just pushes me to drink upto my limits. Or maybe he's the only male I'm comfortable enough to actually risk puking infront of. Hehehe…
A lot of years have passed. I am now 25 years old. I have gone to different schools, lived in different environments, met different people, hanged out with different friends. As they say, the only thing constant in this world is change. Through the help of technology, I am once again keeping in touch with people I have barely seen in years. Of course, it is a given that I am probably not the same person as they used to know. Being the obsessive-compulsive person that I now am, I have made up a list of things that will give people an idea of the person that I now am, since the last time that they saw me. This is for all my friends whom I haven’t seen for a long time. I miss you guys…
1. SPORTS HAS NEVER INTERESTED ME.
I have no competitive bone at all in my entire body. Watching basketball actually bores me… Sorry, Dingdong. Now, you know that I was just faking the excitement whenever I was cheering for you during your basketball games back when we were still dating. Sorry…
2. I AM FRUSTRATED WRITER.
I like writing short stories. I usually base the characters on people I know. I do admit that my work is not really that good enough to be published, my writing style is still very unrefined and my English is not that eloquent but I just enjoy seeing the people I know immortalized on paper, in plots and situations that I want them to be in…
3. MY BIGGEST REGRET IN LIFE IS GIVING UP A 10-YEAR FRIENDSHIP WITH A VERY CLOSE MALE FRIEND BECAUSE OF A STUPID BOYFRIEND WHO FELT THREATENED BY MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM...Sorry, Gaf! You were right and I was wrong. Wherever you are, let's be friends again, please…
4. WHENEVER I BREAK UP WITH A GUY, I NEVER EVER TRY TO GET BACK WITH HIM.
For me, closed doors should always stay closed.
5. I HATE MESS.
If I was in Friends, I would be Monica. I can’t watch TV if the living room is untidy. I never study without arranging the things in my desk. And since I share a bedroom with my sister, I always yell at her if she never puts her things in the proper place.
6. I LOVE MOVIES.
I try to watch at least one movie a day. Cable TV is my new bestfriend.
7. My favorite foods are HOPIA MONGO CUBE, TUKNENENG, SALTED EGG WITH TOMATOES, FRIED CHICKEN SKIN, BANANA HEART SALAD, MCDONALD'S FRENCHFRIES and MUSHROOM BURGER AT BURGER KING.
I’m very “cowboy” when it comes to my food. Fine dining cuisine just isn’t for me.
8. I AM APOLITICAL.
Politics doesn’t particularly interest me. I have never voted nor registered during election... But, if anyone of my friends is planning to run for office, I would gladly register at Comelec and vote for him/her.
9. I HAVE BAD LUCK WITH MY CHOICE OF BOYFRIENDS.
Enough said.
10. Last but certainly not the least, I have drank alcohol plenty of times but I HAVE ONLY BEEN DRUNK TWICE.
The first time was at Kaye’s house with my highschool classmates and the second time at Boalan Resort during an overnight. Strangely, Paul, my bestfriend, was around during both times. There must be something about him that just pushes me to drink upto my limits. Or maybe he's the only male I'm comfortable enough to actually risk puking infront of. Hehehe…
The Ten Types of Guys All Women Should Date At Least Once In Their Lifetime
1. A younger guy
Pros: Sure, he may prefer to play Red Alert and trade Magic Cards than swapping saliva with you but believe me, that only makes it a lot better. Being the so-called more mature one in this May-December affair, you can pretend to be wise and all-knowing when it comes to love, relationships and sex than you actually are. He would be totally unaware how inexperienced you really are because let's face it, these guys are usually more inexperienced than you. Think power tripping and Dominatrix.
Cons: He doesn't know a vagina from a urethra.
2. The long-distance guy
Pros: Absence makes the heart go fonder.
Cons: Absence makes the heart go fondle someone else.
3. The brainy guy
Pros: This guy can recite the periodic table and whisper Shakespeare seductively behind your ears. He can mesmerize you by quoting Pablo Neruda's If You Forget Me "...If each day a flower climbs up your lips to seek me..." And even if you are dumb and at your class's bottom ranking, nothing makes you look smarter than hanging out with Boy Genius himself. The best pat of this package is that because these guys are usually girlfriendless since birth and are usually dateless, they will always be available. Highly recommended for girls who always forget to plan ahead and need last-minute dates to some party, wedding, or event where the ex-boyfriend may also be present.
Cons: His mother might not let him go out past 6 pm. And especially not with you.
4. The One-Night Stand Guy
Pros: Hot guy + kinky girl = Recipe for a really wild night
Cons: "How the hell am I going to tell my parents I got knocked up by some guy I don't even know?"
5. Your Bestfriend's Boyfriend/Brother/Bestfriend
Pros: Sure he maybe related to your bestfiend, but when the time comes that your BFF (Bestfriends Forever!) is really annoying the hell out of you, your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend can be very useful for some revenge under the sheets. Nothing says "I hate you but I can't tell it to your face because you boost my social life and you've still got my favorite Third Eye Blind T-shirt and Masculados CD" better than dating your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend.
Cons:
For the bestfriend's boyfruiend: You may not be invited to their wedding.
For the bestfriend's brother: She may start dating your 13-year old brother. Just to spite you.
For the bestfriend's bestfriend: She may thank you for finally proving that her bestfriend is not gay, and thus, finally hook up with him.
6. A dumb jock
Pros: The Prom King, Highschool Varsity MVP, Student Body President, Class Hearthrob... This guy can be your biggest trophy ever. You can parade him in your old school, restaurant, park, mall, beach or even the hospital. Because he is a David Duchovny look-aklike, when people see you with him, they will think that you are such a hotshot. This guy loves to talk about himself so you won't waste an iota of brain neuron nor energy when out on a date with him. He is the best companion during post-duty, when you are just too tired to do anything but be there and pretend to listen to all the crap he says about that winning 3-point shot he did back in highschool during a basketball game versus Chong Hua. Most of these guys are financially loaded so learn how to make him buy things for you without sounding like a golddigger.
Cons: He is nothing a but a trophy. Enough said.
7. Your bestfriend
Pros: He knows all your deepest darkest secrets, the qualities of your ideal man and the things that will make you really horny. He can make you the happiest girl alive, if you let him.
Cons: You tramp! Is nothing sacred with you?
8. A musician
Pros: I'm not talking about the guy who plays the cello or the trombone. I am talking about the bad-ass guy who plays an electric guitar or the drums. The ones who listen to Slapshock, Greyhoundz or Pantera. The one with tattoos strategically placed at the most obvious places. The ones your parents warned you about... Dating him will make that loser of a guy who has been inlove with you since Grade 3 afraid of being even in the same room with you. Dating him will make you look really tough despite the fact that you cry everytime you watch "Wish Ko Lang..." Dating him will entitle you to a 25% discount at the nearest tattoo parlor. Last but not the least, it will certainly piss off your mother.
Cons: These guys have egos the size of St. Luke's Hospital. Therefore, they need a lot of ego-stroking. Also, because these guys frequently sleep with groupies, beware of VD (Veneral Disease).
9. The really older guy
Pros: They know their stuff. Highly recommended for girls with Daddy issues.
Cons: Ewwwwwwwwww!!!
10. A classmate
Pros: Like brainy guys, classmates are always available since you are always with them. Your parents will also be sure to love them especialy because, like in my case, he will also be a future doctor someday. And what parent doesn't dream of having both a daughter and a son-in law in the medical profession?
Cons: A relationship with a classmate gets old too fast. The 8 hours in school + 5 hours making out after school + 2 hours on the phone when you get home + 1 hour texting each other after you had put the phone down = "I'm tired of looking at your ugly face so will you please get the hell away from me!"
Despite what everybody else might think, I haven't dated #3, 4, 5, 9 and 10.
YET.
I'm only 25. There's plenty of time for me to try as many fishes in the ocean. Just watch out when I finally do... Mwahahahaha!!!
1. A younger guyPros: Sure, he may prefer to play Red Alert and trade Magic Cards than swapping saliva with you but believe me, that only makes it a lot better. Being the so-called more mature one in this May-December affair, you can pretend to be wise and all-knowing when it comes to love, relationships and sex than you actually are. He would be totally unaware how inexperienced you really are because let's face it, these guys are usually more inexperienced than you. Think power tripping and Dominatrix.
Cons: He doesn't know a vagina from a urethra.
2. The long-distance guy
Pros: Absence makes the heart go fonder.
Cons: Absence makes the heart go fondle someone else.
3. The brainy guy
Pros: This guy can recite the periodic table and whisper Shakespeare seductively behind your ears. He can mesmerize you by quoting Pablo Neruda's If You Forget Me "...If each day a flower climbs up your lips to seek me..." And even if you are dumb and at your class's bottom ranking, nothing makes you look smarter than hanging out with Boy Genius himself. The best pat of this package is that because these guys are usually girlfriendless since birth and are usually dateless, they will always be available. Highly recommended for girls who always forget to plan ahead and need last-minute dates to some party, wedding, or event where the ex-boyfriend may also be present.
Cons: His mother might not let him go out past 6 pm. And especially not with you.
4. The One-Night Stand Guy
Pros: Hot guy + kinky girl = Recipe for a really wild night
Cons: "How the hell am I going to tell my parents I got knocked up by some guy I don't even know?"
5. Your Bestfriend's Boyfriend/Brother/Bestfriend
Pros: Sure he maybe related to your bestfiend, but when the time comes that your BFF (Bestfriends Forever!) is really annoying the hell out of you, your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend can be very useful for some revenge under the sheets. Nothing says "I hate you but I can't tell it to your face because you boost my social life and you've still got my favorite Third Eye Blind T-shirt and Masculados CD" better than dating your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend.Cons:
For the bestfriend's boyfruiend: You may not be invited to their wedding.
For the bestfriend's brother: She may start dating your 13-year old brother. Just to spite you.
For the bestfriend's bestfriend: She may thank you for finally proving that her bestfriend is not gay, and thus, finally hook up with him.
6. A dumb jock
Pros: The Prom King, Highschool Varsity MVP, Student Body President, Class Hearthrob... This guy can be your biggest trophy ever. You can parade him in your old school, restaurant, park, mall, beach or even the hospital. Because he is a David Duchovny look-aklike, when people see you with him, they will think that you are such a hotshot. This guy loves to talk about himself so you won't waste an iota of brain neuron nor energy when out on a date with him. He is the best companion during post-duty, when you are just too tired to do anything but be there and pretend to listen to all the crap he says about that winning 3-point shot he did back in highschool during a basketball game versus Chong Hua. Most of these guys are financially loaded so learn how to make him buy things for you without sounding like a golddigger.
Cons: He is nothing a but a trophy. Enough said.
7. Your bestfriend
Pros: He knows all your deepest darkest secrets, the qualities of your ideal man and the things that will make you really horny. He can make you the happiest girl alive, if you let him.
Cons: You tramp! Is nothing sacred with you?
8. A musicianPros: I'm not talking about the guy who plays the cello or the trombone. I am talking about the bad-ass guy who plays an electric guitar or the drums. The ones who listen to Slapshock, Greyhoundz or Pantera. The one with tattoos strategically placed at the most obvious places. The ones your parents warned you about... Dating him will make that loser of a guy who has been inlove with you since Grade 3 afraid of being even in the same room with you. Dating him will make you look really tough despite the fact that you cry everytime you watch "Wish Ko Lang..." Dating him will entitle you to a 25% discount at the nearest tattoo parlor. Last but not the least, it will certainly piss off your mother.
Cons: These guys have egos the size of St. Luke's Hospital. Therefore, they need a lot of ego-stroking. Also, because these guys frequently sleep with groupies, beware of VD (Veneral Disease).
9. The really older guy
Pros: They know their stuff. Highly recommended for girls with Daddy issues.
Cons: Ewwwwwwwwww!!!
10. A classmate
Pros: Like brainy guys, classmates are always available since you are always with them. Your parents will also be sure to love them especialy because, like in my case, he will also be a future doctor someday. And what parent doesn't dream of having both a daughter and a son-in law in the medical profession?
Cons: A relationship with a classmate gets old too fast. The 8 hours in school + 5 hours making out after school + 2 hours on the phone when you get home + 1 hour texting each other after you had put the phone down = "I'm tired of looking at your ugly face so will you please get the hell away from me!"
Despite what everybody else might think, I haven't dated #3, 4, 5, 9 and 10.
YET.
I'm only 25. There's plenty of time for me to try as many fishes in the ocean. Just watch out when I finally do... Mwahahahaha!!!
A Letter To My Future Husband a.k.a. Man of My Dreams
My love,
I miss you...
Even when I haven't met you yet, I already miss you. What is taking you so long to come into my life? Are you already screwing some hoe behind my back, even before our paths had even crossed?... Or maybe you actually are, which I guess I should be thankful for, because this at least means that I will not be the only girl in this world who will think you are hot. Love is sooo not blind!
I have been passing my time with horny jerks and boys pretending to be men while destiny is still too busy to let our paths cross. Don't get me wrong. I am not a slut. I just want to look at what I'll be missing until you finally arrive. By then, my eyes will be all yours. Or at least, whenever you are within 5 miles radius of me.
I am deeply curious as to who you are. We might have met each other already before, not knowing that we were going to end up with each other. And while I think of you as the one probably screwing my bestfriend/my highschool math teacher/my mother/my neighbor's pet chihuahua/my gay senior resident now, I look forward to the time when I'll finally meet you. Me, with my oily face and post-duty tiresome body and you in your favorite ratty T-shirt and 2 week old jeans. You look at me and I look at you... and it would be kismet! Love at first sight!... We will be unable to keep our hands off each other. You will introduce me to your parents, have wild kinky sex in the dark corner between Room 10 and Radiology, ask me to marry you... And to think, it was only our first date!
We will be so inlove that everything else will be forgotten. My studies, medicine, our friends, our parents. We will be so inlove that you will not sneak quick glances at my hot classmate with the big breasts or the bootylicius ass. You will completely ignore my hot cousin who has been repeatedly asked to go on several TV commercials. You will love me and me only. I will be your sole source of air and water, your only reason for living.
I will wait for you, my love. Even if it takes me years. Even if my biological clock is ticking madly and I was near menopausal. Even if my mom is already threatening to cut off my inheritance if I don't get married anytime soon to any guy within 10 mile radius... I will wait for you.
Because I know that you and I are meant for each other.
Love,
Me
I miss you...
Even when I haven't met you yet, I already miss you. What is taking you so long to come into my life? Are you already screwing some hoe behind my back, even before our paths had even crossed?... Or maybe you actually are, which I guess I should be thankful for, because this at least means that I will not be the only girl in this world who will think you are hot. Love is sooo not blind!
I have been passing my time with horny jerks and boys pretending to be men while destiny is still too busy to let our paths cross. Don't get me wrong. I am not a slut. I just want to look at what I'll be missing until you finally arrive. By then, my eyes will be all yours. Or at least, whenever you are within 5 miles radius of me.
I am deeply curious as to who you are. We might have met each other already before, not knowing that we were going to end up with each other. And while I think of you as the one probably screwing my bestfriend/my highschool math teacher/my mother/my neighbor's pet chihuahua/my gay senior resident now, I look forward to the time when I'll finally meet you. Me, with my oily face and post-duty tiresome body and you in your favorite ratty T-shirt and 2 week old jeans. You look at me and I look at you... and it would be kismet! Love at first sight!... We will be unable to keep our hands off each other. You will introduce me to your parents, have wild kinky sex in the dark corner between Room 10 and Radiology, ask me to marry you... And to think, it was only our first date!
We will be so inlove that everything else will be forgotten. My studies, medicine, our friends, our parents. We will be so inlove that you will not sneak quick glances at my hot classmate with the big breasts or the bootylicius ass. You will completely ignore my hot cousin who has been repeatedly asked to go on several TV commercials. You will love me and me only. I will be your sole source of air and water, your only reason for living.
I will wait for you, my love. Even if it takes me years. Even if my biological clock is ticking madly and I was near menopausal. Even if my mom is already threatening to cut off my inheritance if I don't get married anytime soon to any guy within 10 mile radius... I will wait for you.
Because I know that you and I are meant for each other.
Love,
Me
Pervert Magnet
I think I am a pervert magnet.
Just last Saturday, as I was shopping at Young Mart, looking through some hair accessories, this guy stood behind me. Because he seemed to be scouring through the hair accessories himself, - I have no idea, why. From my peripheral vision, this late 30's-early 40's ugly guy seemed to be balding and didn't need any of it - I didn't mind him, of course. Despite the fact that he seemed to be invading my personal space bubble, I ignored the guy and proceeded to do my own thing.
Until he stood too close and deliberately began rubbing his stupid erection on the back of my thigh.
My God, what an asshole, right? At first, I figured, maybe it was just a coincidence and that maybe I was just imagining it. So, I moved towards the side, a few feet away from him, still looking through the same hair accessories. But the ugly guy followed me and continued to rub his stupid erection on my legs. I couldn't deny it anymore. This guy was already harassing me. To think, I wasn't wearing anything seductive - unless you count jeans and a baby-tee as visually erotic - and I have actually worn far more revealing in public without being sexually objectified. I got pissed off, moved back to my previous position and there he was again, doing the same perverted act. Now, I was a little afraid this time, so I walked towards the T-shirt section, pretending to be looking for something. But the ugly guy followed me, also pretending to be looking for something.
I got pretty scared already so I decided to go to the 2nd floor of the said store. Thankfully, the ugly guy didn't have the energy to follow me.
I know what you're thinking. I should have gone to the security guard and told him to reprimand the ugly guy. But I didn't want to be involved in a scandal and frankly, I didn't have the energy nor the money to file a case against him. Besides, I just wanted to get the hell away from there and pretend the whole thing never happened.
Like I said from the very beginning, this wasn't the first time something like this happened to me. Back in Manila, I was harassed twice while riding a public jeepney. The first time was when my seatmate in the PUJ, who had his arm behind me at the rails, began to slowly move his hand from my back towards the side of my breast. Naturally, I climbed out of the jeepney. The second one was when another seatmate in the PUJ, whom I thought was sleeping with his hands crossed in his lap and his bag over those hands, began to slowly inch one of his hands towards my groin. I slapped his hand hard. Also in Manila, as I was watching a movie at SM, this guy sat beside me and masturbated right then and there. I partially blame myself for that because I was stupid enough to watch a movie alone for the first time wearing shorts but I didn't expect to be harassed considering that I was watching a GP movie entitled "Parent Trap." I stood up and sat down instead right beside a couple of 5 year-olds watching with their parents.
Why oh why do these things happen to me? I mean, why do perverts always seem to gravitate towards me. They can always seem to find me wherever I am, whatever I'm wearing... Do I have a sign on my forehead that says "Victimize me, all you perverts!" or "Harass me, please." Just what is it about me that makes them head towards me with their quick sticky hands and puny little erections?
I mean, I don't really see myself as a prude and when friends joke to me about sex or the size of my breasts, I don't really have a problem with it. If my male friends want to lie their back on my chest, it's okay with me. It's not a big deal at all because I know that afterwards, they won't be going to the comfort room to whack themselves off. I know that they respect me too much to do that.
But I also have my limitations and letting strangers have their way with me with their perverted acts... well, that's just sick! No self-respecting girl actually gets off on letting perverts do their thing infront of her... And why do these guys find it exciting to harass a girl in that way? These guys seriously are in need of some professional help. And a job to occupy their minds. Not to mention, a life.
I mean, seriously, guys. Grow up!
Monday, May 01, 2006
Rendezvous Part Deux - Still Not a True Story
"And so, that salesgirl from SM trying to pass off as Ferdinand's wife texted me again last night. Again, using the wrong grammar. What a bitch. I honestly can't believe Ferdinand would actualy choose someone like her!"
"Kulang lang yan sa inom, Janice," Greg chided as he poured another bottle of beer into Janet's already empty glass.
My classmates and I laughed. I couldn't help rolling my eyes. Janice has been spewing up that same story for the past three years. We've given her all sorts of advice which she never listened to and still she complains. Hayyy... love sucks, doesn't it?
My phone rang. I went outside, away from the sound of Carlo doing his Videoke version of Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit" and my classmates' rowdy voices as I tried to listen to the person on the other line.
It was him.
"Hello?"
"Lasa, asan ka ngayon?"
"I'm with my classmates, inuman konti. Why man?"
"Can you come here?"
I smiled. "Now?"
"Kung okey lang sa'yo."
"Give me 15 minutes."
I made up a hasty excuse about my mom looking for me - which of course, knowing me, Janice didn't buy - and rushed to ZCMC. I found him in the Hematology room, sitting in a stool with his back on me, busy looking through the microscope... God, he was so cute. Those curls at the back of his neck were incredibly adorable.
I slid my arms around him and kissed him lightly on the cheek. " Hey, you."
He turned around, entwined his fingers with my own and smiled at me. "Hey, you're here."
"How come mag-isa ka lang ata dito? Where's everybody?"
"Charisse went to the ER, I think."
I plopped myself on top of the counter beside the centrifuge machine, playing around with the tufts of paraffin wax. "And the rest?"
"Asleep." And the look he gave me was nothing else but naughty.
I grinned mischievously. "Oh, really now?"
He walked towards to me, standing himself right infront of me, his hands on my hips. "Yes, really now," he remarked, but not before planting a quick smack on my lips.
I put my arms around his neck, running my fingers briefly through curls in his nape, and looked him in the eye. "I love your eyes, do you know that? Why do you have incredibly beautiful eyes, Rox?"
"Sorry, lasa. Nasa genes na namin yan... You know, if we had a baby, he'd have my eyes, your nose and your lips and hopefully, a perfect combination of our bodies."
I laughed heartily. " You have a nice body."
"Yeah. For a wire hanger."
"And I already know that I'm incredibly sexy."
"Oh, yeah. Said the girl suffering from Reverse Body Dysmorphic Disorder."
I scowled, pretending to be mad at him. "So, you don't like my body?"
He grinned. "I adore it."
"Good." And then I kissed him again. "Magtrabaho ka na nga muna diyan."
"O siya," he answered, returning to the slide that he was busy looking at a while ago."Tapusin ko lang tong diff. count nito sandali."
... To be continued...
"And so, that salesgirl from SM trying to pass off as Ferdinand's wife texted me again last night. Again, using the wrong grammar. What a bitch. I honestly can't believe Ferdinand would actualy choose someone like her!"
"Kulang lang yan sa inom, Janice," Greg chided as he poured another bottle of beer into Janet's already empty glass.
My classmates and I laughed. I couldn't help rolling my eyes. Janice has been spewing up that same story for the past three years. We've given her all sorts of advice which she never listened to and still she complains. Hayyy... love sucks, doesn't it?
My phone rang. I went outside, away from the sound of Carlo doing his Videoke version of Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit" and my classmates' rowdy voices as I tried to listen to the person on the other line.
It was him.
"Hello?"
"Lasa, asan ka ngayon?"
"I'm with my classmates, inuman konti. Why man?"
"Can you come here?"
I smiled. "Now?"
"Kung okey lang sa'yo."
"Give me 15 minutes."
I made up a hasty excuse about my mom looking for me - which of course, knowing me, Janice didn't buy - and rushed to ZCMC. I found him in the Hematology room, sitting in a stool with his back on me, busy looking through the microscope... God, he was so cute. Those curls at the back of his neck were incredibly adorable.
I slid my arms around him and kissed him lightly on the cheek. " Hey, you."
He turned around, entwined his fingers with my own and smiled at me. "Hey, you're here."
"How come mag-isa ka lang ata dito? Where's everybody?"
"Charisse went to the ER, I think."
I plopped myself on top of the counter beside the centrifuge machine, playing around with the tufts of paraffin wax. "And the rest?"
"Asleep." And the look he gave me was nothing else but naughty.
I grinned mischievously. "Oh, really now?"
He walked towards to me, standing himself right infront of me, his hands on my hips. "Yes, really now," he remarked, but not before planting a quick smack on my lips.
I put my arms around his neck, running my fingers briefly through curls in his nape, and looked him in the eye. "I love your eyes, do you know that? Why do you have incredibly beautiful eyes, Rox?"
"Sorry, lasa. Nasa genes na namin yan... You know, if we had a baby, he'd have my eyes, your nose and your lips and hopefully, a perfect combination of our bodies."
I laughed heartily. " You have a nice body."
"Yeah. For a wire hanger."
"And I already know that I'm incredibly sexy."
"Oh, yeah. Said the girl suffering from Reverse Body Dysmorphic Disorder."
I scowled, pretending to be mad at him. "So, you don't like my body?"
He grinned. "I adore it."
"Good." And then I kissed him again. "Magtrabaho ka na nga muna diyan."
"O siya," he answered, returning to the slide that he was busy looking at a while ago."Tapusin ko lang tong diff. count nito sandali."
... To be continued...
Hema Boy
Why are most Medtechs good-looking?
I mean seriously. Do they inhale certain reagents that make them more appealing to the eyes? Does looking at microscopes all day make their eyes glow and their eyelashes more curlier? Does the odor of urine and stool convert to perfume when it comes in contact with their skin?
Okay, I admit. That's just preposterous. Hehehe...
Why can't my classmates be as good-looking as the Medtechs? Hahaha... Joke lang guys. Cute din naman kayo for me. Mas cue nga lang sila.
I've already noticed Hema Boy around way back during my duties at the major departments. He seemed really nice, acommodating, friendly with a little hint of shyness... Just the way I like it... But it was my last day of Hematology when I finally got the nerve to have a decent conversation with him... Yes, I call him Hema Boy because despite bumping into him for the past two weeks in the laboratory, it was only when we were both in the Hematology Department that fate finally intervened.
Of course, once again, malupit talaga ang tadhana. I finally got to talk to him at the last day of my duty. MY LAST DAY! It'll be a long time before I go back to the hospital. Cupid must be laughing at me from above as he watched Hema Boy assisting me with the blood typing, his hand on top of mine, my heart pitter-pattering as I tried to feign interest in doing the blood typing.
He had such nice cherubic eyes. He reminded me of this guy I used to have a crush on in highschool. And he had hair that curled adorably in his nape. You have to stop yourself from wanting to touch it... But he wasn't perfect. I mean, okay, so he had the body of a wire hanger but still, if you were talking to him and you were looking into his face, I'd say, he was very VERY VERY nice to look at...
Looks like I have a lot more reason to look forward to during my hospital paybacks in May. Hehehe...
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
