The Ten Types of Guys All Women Should Date At Least Once In Their Lifetime


1. A younger guy

Pros: Sure, he may prefer to play Red Alert and trade Magic Cards than swapping saliva with you but believe me, that only makes it a lot better. Being the so-called more mature one in this May-December affair, you can pretend to be wise and all-knowing when it comes to love, relationships and sex than you actually are. He would be totally unaware how inexperienced you really are because let's face it, these guys are usually more inexperienced than you. Think power tripping and Dominatrix.

Cons: He doesn't know a vagina from a urethra.

2. The long-distance guy

Pros: Absence makes the heart go fonder.

Cons: Absence makes the heart go fondle someone else.

3. The brainy guy

Pros: This guy can recite the periodic table and whisper Shakespeare seductively behind your ears. He can mesmerize you by quoting Pablo Neruda's If You Forget Me "...If each day a flower climbs up your lips to seek me..." And even if you are dumb and at your class's bottom ranking, nothing makes you look smarter than hanging out with Boy Genius himself. The best pat of this package is that because these guys are usually girlfriendless since birth and are usually dateless, they will always be available. Highly recommended for girls who always forget to plan ahead and need last-minute dates to some party, wedding, or event where the ex-boyfriend may also be present.

Cons: His mother might not let him go out past 6 pm. And especially not with you.

4. The One-Night Stand Guy

Pros: Hot guy + kinky girl = Recipe for a really wild night

Cons: "How the hell am I going to tell my parents I got knocked up by some guy I don't even know?"

5. Your Bestfriend's Boyfriend/Brother/Bestfriend

Pros: Sure he maybe related to your bestfiend, but when the time comes that your BFF (Bestfriends Forever!) is really annoying the hell out of you, your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend can be very useful for some revenge under the sheets. Nothing says "I hate you but I can't tell it to your face because you boost my social life and you've still got my favorite Third Eye Blind T-shirt and Masculados CD" better than dating your bestfriend's boyfriend/brother/bestfriend.

Cons:
For the bestfriend's boyfruiend: You may not be invited to their wedding.
For the bestfriend's brother: She may start dating your 13-year old brother. Just to spite you.
For the bestfriend's bestfriend: She may thank you for finally proving that her bestfriend is not gay, and thus, finally hook up with him.

6. A dumb jock

Pros: The Prom King, Highschool Varsity MVP, Student Body President, Class Hearthrob... This guy can be your biggest trophy ever. You can parade him in your old school, restaurant, park, mall, beach or even the hospital. Because he is a David Duchovny look-aklike, when people see you with him, they will think that you are such a hotshot. This guy loves to talk about himself so you won't waste an iota of brain neuron nor energy when out on a date with him. He is the best companion during post-duty, when you are just too tired to do anything but be there and pretend to listen to all the crap he says about that winning 3-point shot he did back in highschool during a basketball game versus Chong Hua. Most of these guys are financially loaded so learn how to make him buy things for you without sounding like a golddigger.

Cons: He is nothing a but a trophy. Enough said.

7. Your bestfriend

Pros: He knows all your deepest darkest secrets, the qualities of your ideal man and the things that will make you really horny. He can make you the happiest girl alive, if you let him.

Cons: You tramp! Is nothing sacred with you?

8. A musician

Pros: I'm not talking about the guy who plays the cello or the trombone. I am talking about the bad-ass guy who plays an electric guitar or the drums. The ones who listen to Slapshock, Greyhoundz or Pantera. The one with tattoos strategically placed at the most obvious places. The ones your parents warned you about... Dating him will make that loser of a guy who has been inlove with you since Grade 3 afraid of being even in the same room with you. Dating him will make you look really tough despite the fact that you cry everytime you watch "Wish Ko Lang..." Dating him will entitle you to a 25% discount at the nearest tattoo parlor. Last but not the least, it will certainly piss off your mother.

Cons: These guys have egos the size of St. Luke's Hospital. Therefore, they need a lot of ego-stroking. Also, because these guys frequently sleep with groupies, beware of VD (Veneral Disease).

9. The really older guy

Pros: They know their stuff. Highly recommended for girls with Daddy issues.

Cons: Ewwwwwwwwww!!!

10. A classmate

Pros: Like brainy guys, classmates are always available since you are always with them. Your parents will also be sure to love them especialy because, like in my case, he will also be a future doctor someday. And what parent doesn't dream of having both a daughter and a son-in law in the medical profession?

Cons: A relationship with a classmate gets old too fast. The 8 hours in school + 5 hours making out after school + 2 hours on the phone when you get home + 1 hour texting each other after you had put the phone down = "I'm tired of looking at your ugly face so will you please get the hell away from me!"

Despite what everybody else might think, I haven't dated #3, 4, 5, 9 and 10.
YET.
I'm only 25. There's plenty of time for me to try as many fishes in the ocean. Just watch out when I finally do... Mwahahahaha!!!