Advice to Incoming Medical Students


Apparently, by some strange miracle, I am now in my 4th year as a medical student. Therefore, I have survived more than three years of medical school already... Three years!... My God, time flies so fast! Parang kailan lang nasa Ebenezer pa kami nagteteambuilduing where Allen was doing her version of the Exorcist and Ella was experimenting whther the grass is greener on the other side =)

So, considering that I am now - ehem, ehem - wiser and more experienced than most... Hahaha! Feeling!... here is my advice to incoming medical students on how to survive ADeZU School of Medicine.

General
1. Even if you were a consistent valedictorian and you graduated magna or suma cum laude, accept the fact that you are not the smartest one in your class.
2. You will one day experience taking the R1 (Remedial Exams). Deal with it.
3. Balance your time. Ikaw din. Hindi ka makakatulog niyan.
4. Always make it a point to go out, have fun and get wild a least once a month. Trust me. You will not regret it.
5. Get a boyfriend. They will keep you sane while in medical school.
6. If you already have one, accept the fact that the boyfriend you have during 1st year may not be the same person that you'll be with when you graduate... That is, if you do graduate.
7. Not all of you in your class will graduate.
8. Problem-based learning means you only have about two hours of classes per day. This doesn't mean you will not study anymore because it just means you have to do a lot of self-studying.
9. Be nice to the Ates at the photocopy place beside Robert's. They will be your friends for the next five years.
10. Don't try to figure out how the MPL and the alpha-coefficient thing works. It doesn't matter. You will still fail at least one exam.
11. Don't worry about the OSCE. Everybody has failed it at least once.
12. If you can't afford your tuition fee, get a scholarship. If you can, don't even think of applying for a scholarship. You will regret it someday.
13. There will always be someone in your class who rarely studies but aces the exams. If you are one of them, good for you. If not, don't go around making stupid rumors about the person and just accept the fact that you cannot be him/her.
14. Dr. Ric, Dra. Benie and Dr. Florendo are th best research advisers. If you are under any one of them, thank God and offer a mass. If not, work thrice as hard on your research.
15. You will have at least one classmate who is very close to the Admin. If you are one, good for you. If not, don't try to be one. Nobody likes a kiss-up.
16. Be humble. Nobody likes a conceited doctor. Everybody hates a conceited medical student.
17. Don't get a part-time job. Medical school will take up ALL of your time.
18. Study. Study hard.
19. And when you party, party hard.

Community
1. Learn to live without the luxuries of home. Kaya nga community, eh.
2. You will not always have running water.
3. You will not always have a clean CR nor a toilet bowl to sit on.
4. You will not always be able to afford beef and chicken, unless native.
5. You might not even have any electricity.
6. Learn to eat vegetables. Even I did.
7. You will not be able to keep any secrets from your groupmates in the community. They wil eventually know every miniscule detail of your personal life. Deal wih it.
8. Be confident about your body. So you have cellulite, guitar ribs, acne conglomata, warts, manboobs, etcetera... So you don't have a good body. So, what? They don't care. Living with you in the community, you are now no longer an object of desire for them.

Clerkship
1. Learn to survive with only one hour of sleep.
2. Always try to look nice. Nobody listens to an unkempt student doctor.
3. Flirting works. Practice as much as you can.
4. When residents scold you, just accept it and learn from it. Don't ignore it but don't take it to your grave either. Or else, you will have a nervous breakdown.
5. A breakdown of departments:

Surgery - the MALE residents are really nice and very accommodating but the endorsements and the OR assists at 2-4 AM will really make you lose your sleep.
Internal Medicine - Toxic! The residents are okay but the quantity and quality of patients, as well as the numerous ward duties will really make you lose a lot of weight. Bring lots of coffee and sleep whenever you can.
Obstetrics and Gynecology - Routinary work but still your residents will really try to break your spirit. WOF Dr. Buena, tagapag-iyak ng mga clerk yan.
Pedia -The residents are okay, some better than most, so just do your work and you'll do fine.
Opthalmology - Enjoy this one. The gadgets are cute. The residents are really nice.
Orthopedics - Enjoy din. Makes you wonder if it's possible to be an orthopedic surgeon even if you're only 5 feet tall and not built like a tree... Don't fall inlove with Papa Lim by the way. He's ours. Hehehe...
Laboratory - Make sure at least one person stays in your post.
Radiology - Even if you are absent, make sure you sign in the attendance logbook.

6. Learn to rely on coffee/Exra Joss/Coca-cola to keep you awake.
7. Practice safe sex. You kinda lose your credibility as a student doctor if you or your girlfriend is pregnant.
8. Come on time and be honest when logging in. Some residents have eyes at the back of their heads.
9. If you feel sick, stay at home. But do it only once. Payback sucks.
10. If you are asthmatic, bring your inhaler. Better yet, bring a nebulizing kit. You will have at least one attack during clerkship.
11. Be nice to the people in the hospital. The nurses wil give you nicknames if you're rude. The IWs will snub you. And the medtechs will make your life miserable if you annoy them. You will be repeatedly told that clerks are the lowest mammal.
12. Don't refuse a date. It'll be a nice break from all that hospital work.