I just attended my highschool reunion for 2008 last night. It has been 10 years since we graduated highschool. Ten years! People got employed, married, had babies, got promoted, became good-looking, grew breasts… So many things have happened in the past ten years. When my Dad picked me up afterwards and asked me how it was, I realized that compared to most of my classmates, I actually still remained the same.
Let me sum things up in three words: Unattached, jobless, dependent.
Yup, that’s me.
A few minutes after I arrived, I was barraged by my classmates’ proudly showing off the pictures of their new babies. As I watched Pote’s first born son running around the room, I realized that I was slowly being left out from the supposed evolution that people expect me to move forward to. People my age were getting married and having babies. It’s a fact. I, on the other hand, am single, has just recently gotten sick of the fling-fling phase and am still waiting for a potential boyfriend who will take me seriously. Although I am not the least inclined to go out and let someone insemminate me just yet, I felt a little tug in my heart when I realized that I don’t know when or if I’ll ever come to have a baby of my own to hold in the near future.
The biological clock in me ticked even louder.
Tick… tick… tick…
But let’s face it. I am so NOT ready for mother hood. Just the idea of a little version of me, running around in her twenties, doing the same things I did behind my mother’s back… it’s enough to give me the creeps. Gahhhd…
I am so NOT ready for anyone to be dependent on me.
Speaking of dependency, because I had chosen to proceed into medicine, compared to most of my classmates, I still lived with my parents. Despite the fact that I’ve already graduated, compared to them, technically, I am still a student. I still depend on my parents for my spending money. It didn’t matter that I was with honors in highschool or I took my pre-med at UP or I graduated at the top of my class last year. Last night, I was still jobless compared to them. Maybe in five years or so, when I’m already Dr. So-and-so, Anesthesiology resident (or Neurosurgery, or Internal Medicine, or Pediatrics, I really haven’t decided yet, although I’m leaning towards Anesthesiology, hehehe…) I might be more, how do I say it, "BIG-TIME" compared to most and I can probably shell out thousands of pesos in one gimmick night… last night, my self-esteem took a nose dive and I coudn’t help feeling a little inferior being around most of them.
Thankfully, my classmates were nice enough not to gloat that fact to my face last night.
It didn’t matter that some of them had already gone to Spain, or can afford to treat our moderator for his airline tickets, or owned digital cameras more expensive than my one semester tuition fee. Last night, we were the same old people who laughed a lot during highschool, who made fun of Almid and were forced to pay P1 everytime we were caught doing it, who danced to a Backstreet Boys song infront of the class while singing "Get down… get down… It’s physics all around!", who photocopied my notes before every periodic exam including all the embarassing "I love you Eduardo" sidenotes, who sang that Thumbelina song while spewing out "Ang islang Taiwan… ay nasa hilaga ng… hilaga ng bansang…" (Shiyet, RJ, I can’t remember what’s next!), who were linked to this guy and that girl (In that note, basta ya se kanamun di Derrick. Pwede! It’s been ten years!… Saang lupalop niyo ba nahagilap yung picture namin dalawa dancing during our 3rd year JS Prom?).
For one night, we were back to being our 17 year old selves once again.
Childish. Immature. Funny.
And we loved it.
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